Jonoave

What I do (Part 1)

2011-10-04T22:25:00.001+08:00

A lot of times people ask me what I study/research/degree. This can briefly be summed as follow

X: So what is your Master degree on?

Me: Molecular Biology.

X: Oh. Sounds fancy/interesting.

*awkward pause, where you can tell they clearly have no idea what I do and don't know how to proceed*

Me: *in attempt to sound friendly* It's kinda like Biotech, but Biotech is more like the business aspect. This is the basic research part.

X: Oh.

Actually, I wasn't really telling the entire truth, kinda like watered-down and measured-in-PPM kind of truth. From Wikipedia:

Molecular biology is the branch of biology that deals with the molecular basis of biological activity ... Molecular biology chiefly concerns itself with understanding and the interactions between the various systems of a cell, including the interactions between the different types of DNA, RNA and protein biosynthesis as well as learning how these interactions are regulated."

It's kinda like saying I'm doing Biology. Or Physics (hah!). It's just a general term for a field of study. While I do quite a several aspects of research, my main interest and focus is on molecular phylogenetics.

For now though, let's focus on understanding the concept of phylogeny. Rather than throw lines of jargons at you, I was pointed to this excellent and well-produced video, which I think does a great job of highlighting the wonder of nature, the concept of phylogeny and why we study it.

More to come..

Pretty fly

2011-10-02T21:30:00.000+08:00

If you're an avid radio listener, chances are you would have heard Keri Hilson's Pretty Girl Rock (which I would say sounds like it's inspired by the rather terrible Pretty Boy Swag by Soulja Boy).

But have you seen the video for it?

It's actually quite awesome, and not a typical "scantily-clad female prancing around with gaggles of males leering after her as if they've never seen an attractive female" music video.

I'm not a music pop culture expert; when I first watched it without reading the description I wasn't really sure what was different transitions were about. Then I quickly identified the similarities of two particular scenes to Rhythm Nation by Janet Jackson and Creep by TLC. Intrigued, I checked out the video description and re-watched the video more carefully this time.

From the official video description:

Follow Keri Hilson through the decades in the video for her single "Pretty Girl Rock," directed by Joseph Kahn. Keri transforms herself into women who have paved the way for black female artists, including Josephine Baker, the first world-famous African-American entertainer; singer Dorothy Dandridge; disco queens Diana Ross and Donna Summers; dance music legend Janet Jackson; and R&B trio TLC.

The order of the artistes, as I've manage to dig around are:

1. Josephine Baker

2. Dorothy Dandrige

3. The Andrews Sister

4. Diana Ross

5. Donna Summers

6. Janet Jackson

7. TLC

As a homage video, I think it is very well-done and it really captures the essence and highlights the differences between each era/artiste. From the rather innocuous flirting of the first 3 artists to the synchronised swaying of Diana Ross and finally to the "tough gal" hip-hop dance of the TLC, I really marvelled at how things have changed and evolved in music and dance and the portrayal of female performers.

I was a little curious about Josephine Baker, so I dug around Youtube a bit and found this: Footage of Josephine Baker performing her infamous Banana Dance at the Folies Bergère in Paris, France c. 1927

If you have not seen the original Rhythm Nation by Janet Jackson, the one portrayed by Keri here is admittedly, quite a watered-down version. But then it's a quite difficult task to recapture the power and awe of the original video by Janet herself, which if I'm not mistaken, probably set the standard for flawless synchronisation and complex choreography in music videos, and an excellent showcase of the raw energy and power of group dancing.

TLC was among the pioneer groups that made hip-hop more mainstream, and females as hip-hop performers in general. I'm not entirely certain about this part, but as hip-hop became more mainstream, I believe hip-hop as a dance also evolved to be accepted as a type of dance - it's a very in-your-face style, wide arm and leg movements, and very energetic. As an example, you can check out this hip-hop routine performed on SYTYCD.

All this stuff might not mean a lot to most folks, but I find it fascinating and interesting, and definitely gives you a slight sense of pause and a raised eyebrow and how things have changed.

Finally...

2011-08-22T10:15:00.002+08:00

It took a longer time than expected, braved through many seemingly innocuous nay-sayers... but finally..

I just submitted my thesis!!!

Phew! Now it's just viva in around 2 months time. But taking a short break in the mean time. Yep, only a short break cos unfortunately still got lots of other stuff to do.

Gloom...

2011-01-30T21:36:00.003+08:00

Today is probably the longest raining day I've ever encountered in UKM.

Started raining around 7.30 am this morning, and has been since the whole day. Alternating between a drizzle and medium downpour the whole day.

Had not seen a peek of the sun at all.

It's gonna be a cold (and lonely*) night.

*which is practically every night anyway.

Random encounter of the kiddy kind

2010-07-03T14:48:00.003+08:00

I was out with my parents out today and they wanted to buy some stuff at this grocery shop/medicine hall. I just wandered around and I saw some tins of brown rice/rice/cereal which was actually baby feed. So I picked one up and checked it out: "For ages 1+...Baby's first solid food!". Apparently there are also "3 delicious varieties" to pick from. A few questions ran through my mind: Would a baby even know the difference between brown rice and regular rice? Wouldn't it taste kinda plain and dull 'cos you can't really put in tons of meat and vegetables? Would a baby like to eat such plain gooey stuff, 'cos I wouldn't...

"Hi mister, so how old is your child?"

It took me a few seconds before I realise that a product salesgirl had crept up behind me, and was actually addressing me. Amazingly, even though my mind went black for a few seconds, I managed to hold back both a mental/physical choke. Composing myself a few seconds later, I replied with a sheepish, "Uh no kids, just looking around" and tried walking away in a seemingly non-embarassed/fazed manner.

ushering toys

2010-07-02T21:21:00.003+08:00

Toy Story 3 is an awesome movie. Almost made me tear up; walking out of the exit a dad asked his little daughter if she's crying, and the mom herself made an audible sniff.

Anyone up for catching Usher next week?

Bull city

2010-06-27T09:37:00.003+08:00

Yes, it's been a long long time since I've came up with a post that has any semblance of appeal and interest. Basically it boils do to procrastination, work, AWOL-ing in the lost Land of the Turtle, and uh, more work.

Anyway here is the long lost photo post of the obligatory "generic tourist pictures"! Pictures are from when I went to Spain last year (yeah, yeah) and Alvin (and his Grey's Anatomy-esque friend) dropped by from his busy work of saving patients and delivering babies to accompany me on a whirlwind tour around Barcelona.

Our first stop was the famous Sagrada Familia. Interestingly I didn't know it was still under construction, and well at 11 euros each we didn't feel like forking out the cash to see the insides of an incomplete building. So we just stood around and grab the best shots we can.

Then we went on to Park Guell, which I feel has quite a interesting history. Guess housing busts aren't a modern economic woe. Getting there was an uphill effort, literally. Which is why I'm thankful they build escalators to get there.

It's quite picturesque; a wide area that's nice for jogging and walking. Views from the hill.

This little lizard is quite famous; it is a highlight of the park. And it also representation of the mosaic art items prevalent in gift shops around Spain.

The following day we went to the cathedral, which turned out quite like how you picture in those books. The dark and forbidding halls emanates an aura of serenity, of smallness, and intrigue. For some reason when I think of old churches, I always picture a lady running up to stairs of a cathedral, banging frantically on the wooden door while shouting, "Sanctuary, Father. Please, I seek sanctuary!"

And unlike the Sagrada Familia, it is complete. Although I think at that time it's undergoing some maintenance.

And for me, nothing screams "old church" better than unreachable colour-tinted windows! Woot!

Montjuic. Uh, looks nice but we didn't go inside.

Then we looked at our map and thought of making a short romp around the park. Before that though, we stopped at a place called La Cascada. Me and Alvin and had no idea what it is, but thought it'd be interesting to go there, just in case it turns out to be a regulare perforamance venue for Cascada. We were a little disappointed that it turned out to be this Cascada instead. But oh well, we still grabbed some cool pictures!

We also dropped by Montserrat. Which was located in some mountains, hidden away from the hustle and bustle of the city. Where the pious folk can pray and seek enlightenment in peace and solitude; cut away from civiliation and modern amenities. Well, except the little train track that goes up all the way to the mountains (45 minutes), which carries throngs of noisy and curious tourists. And other than the little bakery, cafe, and gift shop over there, which is totally irrelevant as I'm sure the priests there subsist only on dry bread and plain water.

View from the monastery overlooking the mountainside.

The main entrance of the monastery.

Statues of patron saints

There's even one of Saint John Baptist de La Salle! Which of course I grabbed a picture with!

Supposedly there are choir performances at certain times by the castrated choir boys. Well, that's what I imagine they are anyway, but since I didn't see them there's no way to verify either way.

More colour-tinted windows!

A few more miscellaneous pics:

A statue which-name-I've-forgotten.

The jetty near my hostel.

Resuscitating post

2010-06-26T09:36:00.001+08:00

*pumps life back into blog*

Hola!

Alice In Wonderland

2010-03-13T19:38:00.002+08:00

I never did like the original story of Alice in Wonderland. I thought it was bunch of random nonsense thrown together, and could never figure out why it's considered a classic children's favourite. So I wasn't really thinking of watching the new Alice in Wonderland move anyway. But a friend asked and I just agreed.

*spoiler alert*

It should have been called "The Narnia/Eragon-plot-recycled-which-happen-to-feature-characters-from-Alice in Wonderland Movie".

And I didn't enjoy it.

Personal rating: 4/10.

What's a good video worth?

2009-11-14T07:05:00.006+08:00

Whew! What a week. Hasn't been feeling well this past week, but today I've been feeling much better and think I'm almost fully healed. Had a bit of fever, cough, running nose etc since Sunday. Think maybe it's cos of all the sight-seeing I've been doing last weekend when Alvin dropped by from UK. It was really cool and fun though, and it's always nice to see the familar face of an old friend, and I have to chuckle at the irony that both of us are from Malaysia and we ended up meeting somewhere in between as a compromise - Spain.

Anyway, I'm a big fan of OneRepublic and heard they've got a new song coming out. I've heard their new song, "All the Right Moves" on youtube a couple of times, but have yet to hear it on radio (back in Malaysia). So anyway apparently they now have an official music video up, which unfortunately I'm not allowed to embed here, so here you go:

One Republic - All the Right Moves

When I first saw the director of the video is Wayne Isham, I can't help but smile. I've noticed his names quite a few times, and he's worked with many of the biggest pop stars in the past like Britney Spears, N'SYNC etc. I like that his videos always seem to have an artistic feel to it, and also quite a good production value. I know music videos these days are a dime a dozen, but I think a good video can really enhance the enjoyment (and sales) of a song, and I quite appreciate videos which are not the typical cheesy storylines, corny dancing, or slo-mo sexy poses, or the endless girls in skimply clothing dancing around some (usually ugly) rapper/hip-hop singer.

For this video, I really enjoyed it and think it's a good video. I like the ambience of it which fits the mood of the song, and the well-choreographed dramatic dancing which blends with the song's tempo. Of course, there are still bits of "artistry" in this video which I can't quite figure out yet. And yeah, I really like the slick feel and overall good production of it.

Here's another old video by Wayne Isham which I find is a bit more creative and fun:
(Damn these official videos! Can't embed them..)

Sneak preview of Kris Allen's new album!

2009-11-10T05:55:00.002+08:00

Get a sneak listen to full-length tracks from the soon-to-be-released album from Season 8 American Idol, Kris Allen!

Check out the tracks here. Just click on the play button next to the speaker.

As a biased Kris fan, I think this is a pretty good album. In fact, I think most of the songs are catchier than David Cook's album last year. I've only listened to it twice, don't wanna listen too much to spoil the fun when I get the CD later.

Favourite tracks: Written All Over My Face, Bring It Back, Let It Rain, Alright With Me, I Need to Know

Firing up the .. pan?

2009-10-26T05:55:00.005+08:00

So in an effort to save money, I've been cooking dinners myself. I mean, why waste a perfectly good kitchen and fridge right? Well, actually not that that perfect. The kitchen is really tiny and lacking what to constitutes to me as essentials - a wok, rice cooker, and a chopping board. Ok ok, so perhaps the hostel wasn't build for an Asian style cooking.

Anyway, so I made fried rice the other day. And trust me, it wasn't easy! I cook the rice the traditional way, ala boiling it in a pot. Turned out quite nicely too. And funny too, that rice is like how noodles and bread are to us - they are just a few of them stocked in 1kg packets at the supermarket, compared to whole array of pasta and bread.

And of course I had to improvise. I had to peel garlic (first time, admittedly) and chop it on plate! For vegetables, I took the easy option of frozen vegetables - but then the variety type here only has beans, carrot, and potato! Yikes, potato in fried rice?! No choice. For meat, I toss in a few handy slices of ham. Flavourings a bit difficult - I had to make do with pepper, soy sauce (which is called spicy sauce here, no idea why since it's completely NOT spicy), and egg.

The last obstacle is the frying part - no wok! So then the non-stick frying pan comes in. Not easy trying to do some 'gentle' rice-frying in the pan.

Well, here's the end result:

Objective rating: 6/10
Personal rating: Bumped up to 7/10 due to hunger and hard effort in making it. And felt damn proud too!

In Barcelona

2009-10-19T01:00:00.003+08:00

Arrived here yesterday. Checked into the hostel. Pretty nice room, with bathroom and kitchen some more. Slept a lot to get rid of jet lag.

Made dinner today - first time too as I've never had a self-kitchen before. Made a simple spaghetti with tomato sauce (sofrito de tomate) and added in sausages (cos it's convenient). Tasted decent. And felt damn proud too.

Climate change

2009-10-15T23:24:00.008+08:00

"A conference is a gathering of important people who singly can do nothing, but together can decide that nothing can be done."

- Fred Allen

That's one of my favourite quotes. I admit, sometimes it does feel like a Sisyphean effort when it comes to environmental issues, such as climate change. Good news are far and in between. Check out this latest news today:

"LONDON (AFP) – The Arctic ice cap will disappear completely in summer months within 20 to 30 years, a polar research team said as they presented findings from an expedition led by adventurer Pen Hadow.

It is likely to be largely ice-free during the warmer months within a decade, the experts added...

...The summer ice cover will completely vanish in 20 to 30 years but in less than that it will have considerably retreated," said Professor Peter Wadhams, head of the polar ocean physics group at Britain's prestigious Cambridge University.

"In about 10 years, the Arctic ice will be considered as open sea..."

I think Nobel Prize winner Professor Paul Krugman summed it up the best in his recent article:

"Every once in a while I feel despair over the fate of the planet. If you’ve been following climate science, you know what I mean: the sense that we’re hurtling toward catastrophe but nobody wants to hear about it or do anything to avert it.

... Part of the answer is that it’s hard to keep peoples’ attention focused. Weather fluctuates — New Yorkers may recall the heat wave that pushed the thermometer above 90 in April — and even at a global level, this is enough to cause substantial year-to-year wobbles in average temperature. As a result, any year with record heat is normally followed by a number of cooler years: According to Britain’s Met Office, 1998 was the hottest year so far, although NASA — which arguably has better data — says it was 2005. And it’s all too easy to reach the false conclusion that the danger is past.

But the larger reason we’re ignoring climate change is that Al Gore was right: This truth is just too inconvenient. Responding to climate change with the vigor that the threat deserves would not, contrary to legend, be devastating for the economy as a whole... "

So do we all just throw up our hands in despair and give in to the inevitable? That we might as well just party away and waste away our planet, since future generations will likely inhabit a wasteland of landfills and unbearably hot planet ala Wall-E?

The thing for me is, if you're not part of the solution, you're part of the problem. Poverty has existed since humans started living in communities? Why do we still keep giving aid to them? So does famine. So does other sorts of problems plaguing the world.

As progressive and advanced our society has become, the truth is all of us like to cling a bit to our past. Our parents still like to talk about the good ol' days growing up in the kampung or how Malaysia was in early ages. And even now, people still go back to their "kampung" in droves for festivities like Hari Raya etc. But what we don't realise is that the same fate is befalling our environment. Soon we will start reflecting on the good ol' days of nice cool weather, shady trees, and when tsunamis, flood, and avalanches are as foreign as Burkina faso.

I believe we can all do our part, no matter how small, to make our lifestyle greener. If it's not out of altruism for the plane, at least to ease our conscience on what kind of world we want our kids to live. Use less energy (electricity, petrol), reduce plastic, try switching to greener products if possible, and recycle.

"The danger posed by climate change cannot be denied. Our responsibility to meet it must not be deferred. If we continue down our current course, every member of this Assembly will see irreversible changes within their borders. Our efforts to end conflicts will be eclipsed by wars over refugees and resources. Development will be devastated by drought and famine. Land that human beings have lived on for millennia will disappear. Future generations will look back and wonder why we refused to act; why we failed to pass on -- why we failed to pass on an environment that was worthy of our inheritance."

-Barack Obama, UN General Assembly Sept 23, 2009

La fotos, episidio dos

2009-10-03T23:04:00.000+08:00

Yikes, I just realised that I've still got a bunch of pics from my last trip to Barcelona which I've not posted up yet! And not to mention that I'll be leaving soon again to Spain. So here they are!

Like I said in my (really long ago) previous post, I didn't get to travel much. Only on the day before leaving, me and my supervisor took the afternoon off for some quick walk around the city. And because it's been almost 2 months now, I can't really remember where we went. We took went on the train and changed at several stops. So, on to the pics!

Ah.. globalisation. And I just remembered a friend tapped me to buy some stuff from Zara from him. Hehe, not gonna happen dude..

Random shots around the city.

A cool classic Coke in a contour glass bottle.

Erm.. I just find this highly amusing. No caption needed.

I'm sure this is a historical building of some sort with a fascinating name and background,
I just don't know it.

From a little pet stall near on a well-known tourist walkway area.

A flower boutique stall.

From the marketplace (top to bottom) - lots of veges; glorious loads of strawberries (which I missed out on buying due to poor money conversion maths); and presumably a butchery.

The customary "I've really been there" picture of proof.

Bonus shots! Taken with my cameraphone as my digital camera was stuffed in my bag somewhere. Really pretty pics of snowy mountains taken from the plane window. And as usual, I've no idea which mountain range they're from.

Lazy to post more stuff. Updates on my current whatabouts tomorrow!

Kris Allen's New Single

2009-09-22T01:20:00.002+08:00

The new single from American Idol 2009 champ, Kris Allen: Live Like We're Dying. Get an early listen of the full song!

The unofficial sequel to High School Musical

2009-07-21T13:48:00.009+08:00

Some bit of fun; came across this self-production called "College Musical" while trawling the web. I'm really impressed with this, I haven't come across such well-produced videos like this on YouTube for a while. It's pretty amazing work - talented cast, great production, and a good script. Nice plot with just the right amount of cheese and humour. If you like HSM, you'll love this. Well even if you don't, I think you'll be pleasantly surprised. Check out the first episode here:

Here are the subsequent episodes:

Episode 2

Episode 3

Personally, I like the second episode the best so far. And though that song/duet in it was very HSM-ish, it's still a great and catchy song.

ETA:

Episode 4 is now up!

The Proposal

2009-07-21T01:19:00.003+08:00

I'm not a big fan of romantic comedies, especially if I'm watching them on the big screen. Toss in some middling actors (IMO) like Sandra Bullock and Ryan Reynolds, and I'll barely consider watching it. So when I got some free tickets, I thought what the heck, I bundled in 2 friends along and trudged to I Utama to watch it.

And it turned out.. pretty enjoyable. I haven't enjoyed quite a movie this much in a while. It wasn't ground-breakingly spectacular, but it never felt like dull moment. This was probably due to the surprisingly good chemistry between the lead actors, and good pacing throughout the movie that you don't really get bored, despite knowing the ending the moment you step into the cinema. The funny parts of the movie was incredibly well-done, natural and just funny enough without resorting to gross, sexist, over-the-top gags (which is a rarity these days).

All in all, the movie is pretty smart in that it knows what it is - a pleasant feel-good romantic comedy. And it manage to do it exceedingly well by getting all the basics right and just a bit more, to get the audience engaged along with the right amount of humour that doesn't detract too much from the heart of the show.

Official synopsis from RottenTomatoes.com:

When high-powered book editor Margaret (SANDRA BULLOCK) faces deportation to her native Canada, the quick-thinking exec declares that she’s actually engaged to her unsuspecting put-upon assistant Andrew (RYAN REYNOLDS), who she’s tormented for years. He agrees to participate in the charade, but with a few conditions of his own. The unlikely couple heads to Alaska to meet his quirky family (MARY STEENBURGEN, CRAIG T. NELSON, BETTY WHITE) and the always-in-control city girl finds herself in one comedic fish-out-of-water situation after another. With an impromptu wedding in the works and an immigration official on their tails, Margaret and Andrew reluctantly vow to stick to the plan despite the precarious consequences.

My rating: 3 1/2 stars out of 5.

"Back in my days..."

2009-07-18T23:30:00.006+08:00

Went to the first-years briefing for the InterCollege VC Cup Debate with Fea - this is technically the 5th one I've been to. Feeling old... *grabs keys and starts driving down memory lane*

-

2009-05-22T00:40:00.010+08:00

This is a gonna be a totally fanboy-ish and intelligence-devoid post, but I've spent the better part of the day without achieving much as I'm too caught up with the American Idol finale results show this morning.

*spoiler alert* In case you were living in a rock or planning to avoid all newspapers/radio and catch the show this weekend.

I was ecstatic that my favourite pick, Kris Allen won. Oh sure, he can likely never outsing Adam Lambert on flu day, but I liked his laid back manner and ability to connect emotionally to a song and convey it. Adam's octave range could probably give Mariah Carey a run for her money, but it always seems as if he's just showing off and putting on a show rather than just conveying a song.. Each performance, he'll have some tripped up lights, smoky effects, costume etc. While visually creative, it detracts me from enjoying the authenticity of a song. And oh, I don't like the tone of his voice too - too wavery, and for some reason he sounds really feminine to me.

So anyway, in the grand design of the cosmos, this is probably totally insignificant - the world economy is still tanking, I still have a proposal attachment to finish up, and a stupid brainwashing camp to attend. But this totally made my day.

ETA: Check out the new single from Kris Allen - the customary 'coronation song'. I usually think this songs are cheesy/sappy, but surprisingly this one is quite alright.
Disclaimer: Possible earworm. Shall not be held responsible for random hummings, or stuck melody in mind.

La fotos, episidio una

2009-05-16T20:48:00.017+08:00

Ok, I lied. I got over jetlag a day after I got back, but procrastination and laziness got in the way. So anyway, there's a quite a few photos so I'm splitting them up two posts, in a sorta-chronological order in between my rambling narratives.

This was my first time venturing out for such a distance on my own, and not surpisingly, my parents were worried sick. But things pretty much went well. As the plane was arriving in the Frankfurt airport (around 6.15 am there), I was caught off-guard by the pilot's announcement that the local temperature was 8 degrees! Yikes. Landed on the erm, open landing (?) area, which was noticably windy and cold, before a bus took us to the airport. Inside the temperature is bit more tolerable.

It was a 6-hour transit, and man was things expensive there. A bottle of mineral water (500 ml) was around 2-3 euros (1 euro = RM4.8)! On the plus sight, coffee's widely available and cheaper there, relative to mineral water of course. So anyways, with my jakun-ness and all, I walked around the airport and took some pics. If you look real close at this departure information display, you can make out my flight - (Orange box), LH 4454 Barcelona.

No matter where you go in the world, you can always look forward to a warm, comfortable cup of coffee. A grande Caramel Macchiato here is 4 euros.

Cool to see some green steps taken by the airport. All the waste bins are like this:

Lots of shops there selling different kinds of shops - including this one which I'm not entirely sure but I think Fea and Alia would probably go ga-ga over:

Somehow, I find it amusing that travellers will just pop in and decide to buy an extremely (overpriced) crystals as they are about to board the plane:

Arrived in Barcelona airport around 1 pm. Took a cab to the hostel - La Residencia Campus del Mar. About 30 minutes ride, and the fare came up to 25 euros! (Double yikes). The rooms are really nice though, if a bit pricey:

Outside view of the hostel:

The hostel is actually within a residential neighbourhood, which is sandwiched between a large (assumably corporate) building and a park. It's also less than 10 minutes of walking distance away from the research institute where I would be heading to. It was really cool to walk around, as the weather there is really chilly, I'd say around 10 degrees in the morning, and bout 15 degrees later in the day. The daytime hours seemed to stretch longer too - 6.30 am over there is kinda like 8.00 am here, while 8.30 pm is kinda like 6 pm here.

I started out a bit earlier on Monday morning, and it was cool to see lots of kids walking around with their parents, presumably to school:

There also seemed to be lots of people cycling around, and later I saw people lugging their folded up bikes into buildings. I spotted many rows of bicycles, I kinda think they're sorta like a rent-a-bicycle service:

More pics and ramblings in the next post!

Home sweet home

2009-05-03T20:56:00.001+08:00

Just a short update. I got home yesterday morning, jetlagg-ed and all. It was an awesome experience in Spain, with me never having gone to a western country before and kinda just making it out mostly on my own this time.

More updates and pix after I'm jetlag-ed free.

So...

2009-04-25T00:31:00.003+08:00

Feeling a bit nervous right now - will be leaving for Spain in later tonight. Initially I was supposed to be going with my lecturer, but due to some scheduling conflict I'll be going there myself first.

Whew. My big adventure into the outside world. Alone. Can't help but feeling jittery - not to mention my parents giving me grief and also kinda worried bout dealing with my co-supervisor in Spain.

Oh, so just a head-up to you guys not to call me for the next week (like in the slightest chance of flying pigs that one of you suddenly decided to). Or else just in case you get landed with a big fat phone bill or watch your credit evaporate.

Adios!

World - 2. Me - 0

2009-03-27T10:23:00.000+08:00

Apparently the forces that be are carrying some sort of grudge against me.

Today I was planning my labwork so that it'll roughly end around noon, so I can wrap up my work, go lunch and call it an early day.

So around 12, I ran a gel electrophoresis. Short description - it's a screening process to see whether I'm successful in generating the products that I want. Takes bout 1 and 1/2 hours, a no-brainer procedure.

Except that for this time after running a countless times for more almost 2 years now, it went kaput on me. To cut the story short - I couldn't find out if I was successful in generating the products I want. Even a negative result would've been better, I would then figure out what I should do next.

Now I have to run the gel again coming Monday. And I wasted around 2 hours in lab, almost starving for lunch while I waited for the gel in vain.

Sigh. I should better start hunting for a rabbit's foot.

Me against the world (and losing)

2009-03-26T21:07:00.001+08:00

Today just isn't my day.

I woke up extra early today to go for class at 9 am, as parking's a nightmare there. A few minutes later, someone received a text message from the lecturer that the class's cancelled, with a replacement on Monday at 11 am.

To make it for that class, I'll probably need to burn some hell money and sacrifice some chickens to get a parking at that time.

I wanted to transfer some money from bank A to bank B. At the Chancellory (2 minutes walk from my college), there is an ATM of bank A and cash deposit machine of bank B. Simple and convenient, right?

Turns out the ATM was kaput. So fine, I walked to the next ATM at Pusanika (10 minutes) away to withdraw. Walked back to the same spot I started earlier to now deposit the cash for Bank B.

Deposit machine making weird noises; rejected all the cash. Tried putting in a couple of RM10 bills to see - also rejected.

Either that deposit machine's spoiled or I'm carrying a huge load of counterfeit cash.

My options now are 1. carry the extra cash around, or 2. walk back to Pusanika to deposit the cash back at the bank A.

Either way, I had just took an extra long walk to withdraw cash I don't need.

Understanding the US credit crisis

2009-02-26T15:18:00.001+08:00

A picture's worth a thousand words, and this short video helps explain where billions of dollars disappeared to.

The Crisis of Credit Visualized from Jonathan Jarvis on Vimeo.

Wrap-up

2009-01-09T09:58:00.003+08:00

Guess it's time for the obligatory wrap-up post for 2008 (ignoring the zero post for December). Christmas and New Year passed by without a bang, as usual. Just met up with some friends, did some work at the lab, and relaxed a bit.

One awesome thing this year was the reinvigorating and comeback of our UKM debaters. We got a pretty good batch this year, and it's not only skills alone. Most of them showed real commitment and interest - things that are usually lacking in the juniors before this. We great inroads at this year's Royals Debate tourney at IIUM (the grandest national-level tourney). This was also my first time adjudicating officially at a tourney, and I was quite suprised that I was pushed all the way to adjudicate till the finals. And well, it's great too that I made some quick bucks too from the adjudicating. Hehe.

This year I actually tried to make some personal developments - on the finance and social side. I started reading up on personal finance, made a budget, track my spending etc. Well, it's never too early to start figuring out your finances and preparing for the (gulp!) golden years of your life (as much as that prospect scares the hell out of me).

On the social part - I started off kinda enthusiastic enough. I buzzed up old acquaintances and friends, and even met up with a few of my secondary schoolmates, though it tapered off towards the end as I worked on another social front. I became a little bit more proactive in meeting new people, and well...we'll see how things goes.

Here's looking to a more productive and exciting 2009, in more ways than one.

Weary weekend

2008-11-15T23:36:00.001+08:00

Tired to type more than a few lines. Am currently at a budget hotel in Sepang for a 1 and 1/2 day workshop. Struggling an presentation and written report due on Monday, where we had our first group meeting yesterday and will be having another group meeting at 4 tomorrow.

Which means I'll need to scrunge up some time between now and then in the midst of this workshop to finish up my part for the group meeting tomorrow, and then work on the written report by tomorrow night.

And right after that - another presentation on Wednesday and term paper due on Friday.

The next weekend couldn't come sooner.

Cost of carelesness

2008-09-17T01:29:00.001+08:00

Sorry for not updating in a while. Been rather busy and distracted with work, assignments and other stuff. Deadlines were planted (and met, mostly), interviews were sprung last minute, and also meeting up with friends who're jetting off.

Anyway, in a bout of carelesness and bad luck, I happened to lose my ATM cards. Thankfully the account balance in the card were still the same. For the first card (Bank Islam), there was a notice that anyone who lost a card to contact the number given. Which I did, through SMS - and then somehow the other person was either being a paranoid or jerk by asking all sorts of stupid questions - "Kau ni melayu ke? Pelajar UKM ke? Betul ke kad ni kau yang hilang?...." For Pete's sake, all I asked was if we could meet up at a Bank Islam ATM machine for me to test if the card is mine. In the end, I just said thanks but no thanks. I'll just go make a missing card report.

So I reported the missing cards. CIMB was quite efficient, I got a new card without much hassle and a penalty of RM12 (inclusive RM8 for a new card). Bank Islam was quite the hassle, I had to get setem hasil for RM20(!) first from the post office. And then later I found out they further deduct another RM8 from my account for the cost of the new card (!!). What the hell - RM28 for a new ATM card! For a bank that claims to be compassionate and conservative, they sure are pretty cutthroat about these administration fees.

2008-08-08T00:22:00.002+08:00

Updates, randomly as I deem fit:

1. Caught The Dark Knight last weekend. An excellent show, definitely lived up to its hype and my own anticipation as must-watch movie. Dark, twisted and not a boring moment in between - this is not just an action movie, it's an action movie with heart and mind. The sociopolitical undertones are very impactive; comparable to V for Vendetta. While the latter is more direct and surreal in its social and political undertones, the former is more subliminal and seamless.

2. Local politics seem to have gone into no-man's-land. Where I've totally lost interest many weeks ago and have stopped reading the papers for a while now.

3. It had been a busy week since last weekend. With a quiz just completed this morning, I can take a slight breather. In between preparing a progress report, studying for a quiz, working on a group assignment, and take some time off to train the juniors, life couldn't be more...

Fulfilling? Strange as it may sound, I've been in quite a positive mood a couple of weeks back since my I officially started my Masters. I don't feel as hollow or dreary just going about doing my work. I feel renewed, reaffirmed once again. Perhaps it's due to a sense that my life is now heading somewhere; in a direction which I could focus and pour my energy.

It tooke me a while to realise this, but we need aims in our life. Something that makes us willing to forsake sleep, turn down outings with friends and don't mind some self-isolation. I used to set really low goals, or none at all. Just doing my best as it's just the right thing to do. But after graduating and taking up a semi-job as an RA, it really is easy and tempting to fall into an easy and couldn't-care-less routine.

People generally thrive on deadlines, or specific time frames. If you give someone his/her ample time to do a job, chances are they'll take longer to produce a work which quality might not be necessarily better compared to if given a time frame. Which is why graduate studies is a different ballgame completely than undergraduate. During undergrad, you have specific classes per semester, specific deadlines for specific assignments, and specific dates for exams. In grad school, you mainly have to complete a research project within a typical period of around 2 years, possibly more. And the few classes mostly consist of lecturers giving general overviews of a topic, and then assignments of doing a term paper (short analysis) of related articles of your choice to be submitted within a month.

It is indeed extremely easy to get lost in the illusory freedom from the constant leash of exams, quizzes and activities back then during undergrad. Afterall, you have 3 or more semesters to do your project, what's the rush? *It's 4 pm in the lab, and running the next part of your experiment will take 1 and 1/2 hours. Should you do it? Well, typical working hours are till 5, never mind that you came in around 10.30 am for staying up late last night for a mamak session. Let's just call it a day, and do that next step tomorrow. Oh, it's noon, time for lunch break! Again, never mind that you came in only 2 hours before that. Yay, my lecturer's on leave. That means he/she won't call the lab today! Which means I can sneak out to Midvalley!

Anyway, back to serious self. Having a focus, once more, really helps to steel myself against the nagging voice of inferiority, especially when meeting up friends who (knowing or unknowingly) describes in long detail their new jobs and salaries, new gadgets they're eyeing, shopping plans, weekend plans, vacation plans etc. I just need to remind myself why I'm doing what I'm doing, and that I'm to going to prove that this is not a dead-end path. I need to prove that for myself as much as for everyon else.

*For surprisingly accurate and hilarious peek into the life of a grad student, try checking out PhD comics.

Edit: Link has been fixed.

Meet the kids

2008-07-15T15:20:00.001+08:00

A few months back, I volunteered to help adjudicate for a HELP College interschool debate. Which was when I found out that my old secondary school took part in it, though I didn't actually get to meet them.

I've been considering for a while on helping some secondary school kids on debating. It seems to be the 'in' thing these days for a *cough*washed-up*cough* debater to do. Sweeks' helping out his old school St. George, while Fea's helping with RMC. And I was thinking what better than my old school? Unfortunately I haven't seen the name LSPJ in some of the interschool debating tournament I've been to, and I didn't want to go through the hassle of starting an entirely new debate team, recruit students etc etc. So I was encouraged to find out that my old school actually sent a debate team for a tournament.

I got in touch with a formerly-Miss-now-Mrs. Sheela and told her about helping to train some students who are interested in debate. She agreed, and after working out a suitable time, I agreed to meet the kids for the very first time yesterday.

Where I was initially a little nervous about. People skills have never been my strong point, especially kids. Alright so they aren't technically "kiddie" kids, but still I'm known to be the most patient person around. So I turn to our resident mother-hen of the UKM team, Fea, for some advice. Which she tried to dispense as well as she could over the phone, and in the end admitting that she was also a little worried for me didn't really help my nerves much.

So then yesterday I left around 11 from Bangi, only to get stuck in traffic jam along the KL-Seremban highway (which later I found out was due to unnecessary police presence with the whole Anwar thing in KL). Luckily I managed to arrive in time, with a secret weapon in tow - Kenny Roger's muffins! Hopefully it'll be enough to bribe the kids to stay put for the entire duration*.

I met the-now-Mrs. Sheela at the porch, and the stepping into my old school again after a long time was a bit disconcerting. I asked her whether she recognised me, to which she said yes and that she had taught me before. I decided to save her the embarassment that no, she hadn't. Just that she had been one of the teacher advisors for Leo Club.

Anyway, my fears were quite unfounded. The kids seemed interested enough, and among them were those who went for the debate in HELP college. Their language proficiency were quite good, and they seemed willing to speak when asked to. I was worried earlier if I might need to use a crowbar to pry their mouths open.

As for myself, I was still a little nervous as I'm not exactly sure how to pullf off this whole mentoring thing. I didn't wanna get too technical with them on our first meet, so I just ran through some basics with them, and sort of did a mini-impromptu debate between them. All in all, I'd like to think my first meet with them turned out quite alright, and we've already made a tentative date for our next meet.

*The kid were ravenous for the muffins, and I didn't even get one as I didn't have the heart to take if from them.

Oil, oil...not a drop to waste

2008-07-01T23:23:00.001+08:00

After 51 years, local politics has taken centrestage in the lives of most Malaysians. Ever since the 13th general election in March, suddenly the political arena is scrutinised so much more by everyday people, excited and wary of every by-the-minute development. Right now, the biggest thing on everyone's mouth is the Anwar fiasco.

But let's skip that for now, what I'm more interested on is the recent huge price increase of petrol, which initially triggered a wide panic by the people who tried to stock up as much as they can before midnight. Just like everyone else, I'm affected by it too. Now I need to fork up 40 bucks to get almost the amount of petrol I could get for 30 bucks. In other words, every 3 refills right now is just almost equivalent to 4 refills in the past.

Unlike most people, I'm somewhat glad by the price hike. Because suddenly, things never heard hitherto - how to save petrol, saving electricity, cutting costs - became nationwide obsession. Things which should've been everyday practices are now touted as the 'new-age' tips of surviving the current situation. We hate to admit it, but all of us are incentive-driven beings - with economic incentive being the strongest. We're only motivated to move our b**ts when our pockets are hit. And it's starting to show too - less jams along roads in KL and highways, and more people taking public transport.

Which in the whole big picture, is good for the environment. Especially with the latest piece of news on global warming. If we're really to go all-out to do our part for global warming, here's what I would suggest:

1. Increase prices of plastic - customers should be charged extra for take-aways using styrofoams and plastic bags. Shopping complexes too, should start charging customers for the number of plastic bags they hand out.

2. Compound garbage collection per weight - When throwing away more will cost you, people will attempt to throw less and recycle more. In fact this is widely practised in countries like Denmark (a recycling haven that should be adopted by every other country).

3. Further increase prices of petrol - but at the same time, improve public transport and provide welfare cushion for the lower income. In countries like Singapore and France, driving is actually more troublesome and takes longer than taking public transport.

Yeah, sure the oil price hike hurts everyone, especially the lower-income group. But with proper welfare structuring and good infrastructure planning, the oil hike in hindsight could be one of the best things to happen. Like the jolt that revolutionised our apathetic attitude to climate change.

New kid in town

2008-05-24T21:53:00.004+08:00

I've never been a religious follower of reality TV, though I do enjoy regular doses of *cough* America's Next Top Model, and sporadic views of others like American Idol, Amazing Race, Hell's Kitchen and Project Runway. So anyway, a few weeks back I caught some of this season's American Idol (AI), and got a bit hooked. I've kinda lost track of AI, only briefly aware of the winners once it's all over.

Anyway, I was deeply interested in one of the participants - David Cook. Yup, the dude who went on to be crowned the Idol title last Thursday. I watched the grand finale this week between the two Davids - Cook and Archuleta. A nail-biting and grand contest between a boy wonder of crooning ballads and a mature rocker.

Frankly, I can't see the fuss over Archulete - he's a great singer, I grant him that. But he's just a really good pop/ballad teen prodigy. Compare this with D. Cook who proves himself beyond a rocker. I mean, c'mon, any guy who can pull off a brilliant cover of a Mariah Carey song gets top marks in my books. Check out his performance here:

I didn't watch the actual episode for the Mariah Carey week, but some information net-prowling revealed that apparently the girls had a tougher time. I can sorta understand, it's a tad tough to match the diva's legendary sixteen-octave range. Most girls (and guys too) chose her power ballads, and well D. Archuleta chose When You Believe. It was quite good, but predictable and boring; and doesn't hold a candle to D. Cook's performance. He was smart enough to realise he couldn't match Archuleta's vocals, so he picked one of MC's most pop-ish song, rearranged it and came up with something totally awesome. And as Simon said, being really brave about it too, as usually most people would pick songs that allow them to show off their long breaths and glass-breaking voices. Like in the finale, D. Archuleta performed 2 ballads, and for individual choice, chose to perform 'Imagine" which he did a few weeks back. D. Cook started off with a crowd-rousing pop-rock "Still Haven't Found What I'm Looking For" by U2, followed by a power rock song, and finally for individual choice; chose a totally new song and performed an acoustic version of it. His choice song was panned by Simon Cowell, but thankfully it did not influence the voters much.

And as to proof himself that he's not a flash-in-the-pan, check out D. Cook's rendition of a song from Phantom of the Opera. Not that I'm music expert, but I think he has excellent vocal control. He sounds breathier and craggy during the rocks songs, and yet can sound polished and soaring for musicals. Just compare the craggy screech he did for Always Be My Baby and the rich, soaring vocals reverberating in Music Of The Night. I find it refreshing to see a singing contestant who exercises control and not try to shatter eardrums at every chance.

A more than deserving winner of American Idol; with proven versatility and star quality beyond that of just a singer. And I'll be keeping an eye out for this dude in the future.

p/s: Try checking his other renditions of Billie Jean and Hello too.

New flash

2008-05-23T14:14:00.002+08:00

Been a bit busy lately - research has been going well, so I've got some results and stuff to work on for a bit. And my college is also undergoing renovation, so I've to move back to my own place for the holidays at least. Which is kinda tiring, as I now have to drive to and fro everyday. Plus the extra burned cash on petrol and toll, not to mention the extra greenhousey-fumes. Not to mention it's a little more crampy, as I can't simply wake up a bit later - or do a quick dash to dinner or Midvalley for something.

And well, I'm also on a bit of a happy mood currently - working and playing with my BRAND NEW Dell laptop! I've been keeping an eye on this for quite some time, waiting patiently for a few weeks for the price to drop. I timed it with its estimated delivery time for about 3-5 weeks, as I need a laptop before I jet off to Spain for an initial discussion with my future attachment co-supervisor. So I placed an order last Tuesday, and lo and behold, it suddenly just turned up on my doorstep last Saturday.

This baby packs quite a punch, in my opinion, for a reasonable price - Intel Core 2 Duo 2.00 GHz, 3 GB RAM, and 160 GB hard disk space. And not t mention a dedicated graphics card - NVidia's GeForce 8400M with 128 MB. Woot! But of course, there's some things I need to get and do first before making this laptop fully-indispensable. Things like an external drive to transfer old files from my PC, partition the hard disk to run a Mac OS, and getting a pair of earphones.

Top view - mine's Midnight Blue skin.

Running on Windows Vista - takes a while to get used to. Some features are better than XP, some are a little worse.

If there's one things I hate most,

2008-05-02T14:26:00.003+08:00

It's packing or unpacking. Ok there's a lot of of other things I don't like as well, but that's for another entry for another day.

Right now, I'm (supposed to) unpacking the things at my lab. The renovation work for my lab has just been completed, so now it's the second phase of unpacking all the things we just packed hastily to be stowed away. And also throwing a lot of things that's not needed or used. I really hate throwing things away too, it's such a waste (pun intended) and simply disposing them like that is a burden to the environment. So far I try to separate the paper and cardboxes, though I've no clue as to whether they'll be recycled or simply discarded just like that with the rest. Sigh...Did I mention that I hate packing?

Yesterday I got an awesome surprise - an enjoyable lunch with a friend who's been AWOL for quite a long while and a cool belated birthday gift too. Totally made my day; well until I have to start unpacking things today. Sigh...

It ain't easy as ABC..

2008-04-21T00:40:00.004+08:00

I'm really impressed by how witty most columnists are in international papers like The New York Times. Locally, some of the wittier columnists whom I enjoy reading are Mary Schneider's "But Then Again" (Star2, Mondays) , Marina Mahathir "Musings" (Star2, Wednesdays), and Azmi Sharom's Analysis (The Star, Wednesdays). It really isn't easy, to me at least, to write with a certain flair that switches effortelessly from amusing to sarcastic to serious in a way unique to that writer. I've to admit, my (supposedly existent) blogging style is quite influenced by what I read, and that includes those writers above.

Like one of my friends, WW, is working for The Star now. I'm always quite amazed to see her work - how on earth does she come up with articles of 2 pages in length every other week simply eludes me. Writing is certainly a skill to be acquired, and unless you were born gifted by the literary gods, it takes a lot of time,effort, and patience to develop. Efforts such as constant reading, writing, and learning.

Anyway, here's an example of witty column which I'd just read recently from NYT; thought I'd share it:

***

Op-Ed Columnist

The Fat Bush Theory

By GAIL COLLINS

George W. Bush says we’re on track to meet the nation’s goals for curbing global warming.

I see some hands waving out there. Didn’t know we had any goals for
curbing global warming? Where were you in 2002 when the president put
us on the road toward reducing the growth of greenhouse gas emissions
by 18 percent by 2012?

So there.

Bush held a press conference in the Rose Garden this week to give us
a warming progress report or, in his words, “share some views on this
important issue.” He almost always refers to global warming as an
environmental “issue.” As The Times’s Andrew Revkin noted on his blog, Dot Earth, most people talk about environmental problems. But perhaps the White House regards that as overly alarmist.

“I’m pleased to say that we remain on track to meet this goal,” the
president said, in a tone that sounded rather belligerent considering
this was supposed to be good news.

Let’s back up here. I don’t know about you, but I’ve always had
trouble getting my head around goals that involve reducing the rate at
which something is growing. To appreciate the administration’s efforts
on the, um, issue, let’s try to imagine it in terms other than
greenhouse gas emissions. (As the president noted: “Climate change
involves complicated science.”)

Suppose that two years after taking office, George W. Bush
discovered that because of the stress of his job, he had gained 40
pounds and was tipping the scales at 220.

The real-world Bush would immediately barricade himself in the
White House gym, refusing all human contact or nourishment until the
issue was resolved. But imagine that he regarded getting fat as
seriously as he regards melting glaciers, rising oceans and drought and
starvation around the planet. In that case, he would set a serious,
management-type goal — of, say, an 18 percent reduction in the rate at
which he was gaining weight, to be reached within the next decade.

Cut to the Rose Garden in 2008 where partial victory is declared.
“Over the past seven years, my administration has taken a rational,
balanced approach to these serious challenges,” the 332-pound chief
executive announces. He delivers this good news sitting down.

2012: Bush hits his final goal and 400 pounds at approximately the same time.

I hope now you can appreciate just how useful the Bush
global-warming initiative is. But the president isn’t satisfied with
merely delivering on his promises. In his Rose Garden address, he upped
the ante, vowing to stop the growth of U.S. greenhouse gas emissions
entirely by 2025.

Let us forget, for a second, that this is a man who’s only going to
be in office for nine months of the 17 years in question. Furthermore,
let us skip lightly over the fact that Bush did not give any hints
whatsoever as to how this goal is supposed to be reached except to say
that “the wrong way is to raise taxes, duplicate mandates or demand
sudden and drastic emissions cuts.”

Since the president never suggests actual behavior changes on the
part of American citizens, that leaves us with what? More efficient
refrigerators?

Lots of things! There is, for instance, the ambitious new fuel
economy standard of 35 miles per gallon by 2020; we sure do have a lot
to look forward to in the future, people. There’s new federal spending
on biofuels. Much of this is for ethanol, which has the unfortunate
side effect of creating more greenhouse gases than it eliminates, and,
of course, helping to create a planetary crisis over rising food costs.
But nothing’s perfect.

The president’s real focus seemed to be on fighting the strategies
for global warming that he doesn’t like: the Kyoto Protocol, court
challenges and legislation pending in Congress. Almost all of them,
interestingly, were referred to as “problems.”

Instead of Kyoto, the administration is pushing for “a new process”
in which the countries that do most of the polluting will get together
and work on a climate agreement. That process was in fact chugging
along this very week at a gathering in Paris, where Bush’s speech was
greeted with a round of excited reviews. Germany’s environment
minister, for instance, dubbed it “losership instead of leadership.”

The Europeans have a perfect right to look down on the United States
since they’ve set much more ambitious targets for reducing global
warming. While they do not appear to be likely to meet any of them,
it’s the thought that counts.

If the Bush strategy seems a little ... little, go back to our
metaphor. Imagine it’s 2025, and you’ve got a 486-pound ex-president
being wheeled in to accept the congratulations of the world on his
excellent physical fitness program. Really, that’s big.

***

By the way, the album I just bought - One Republic's Dreaming Out Loud - has really grown on me. I've been practically playing it non-stop since I got it.

Some things don't change, some do...

2008-04-19T23:57:00.000+08:00

Sometimes I get too wrapped up around myself that I tend to forgot the simple things in life like spending time with good company. On some unknown-post-birthday-slightly-daring streak , I've been asking quite a number (actually a few, but for me it's a new record) for outings like lunch etc. Really hope it's not the old-age-crisis/loneliness fear that's driving me.

A couple of days ago, went out for dinner with Fea and realised that's been quite a while since we the last time we really just sit relaxedly and having a great time. The next day I went out for lunch with PY, whom again I haven't seen in ages and had since undergone an almost remarkable physical transformation. And I too realised how few are the people whom I'm really comfortable and sharing a similar wavelength. Just being in the company of a that person and letting yourself loose can be extremely therapeutic.

Today I went for breakfast and lunch with two different groups of friends. The breakfast one was with a few old secondary school friends. It started of like this - In my (rare) semi-desperate moment of getting a lunch date last weekend, I tried contacting some old friends from Form 5, also collectively known a "the gang". It didn't work out but I guess Eric wanted to make up for it, so he asked me for breakfast this morning at Raju's, an undeservingly hyped-up and overpriced mamak directly next to our alma mater. Supposedly there would be Ben and Chong too.

The crowd turned out to be a bit bigger - Weng Yew came along, with Kok Wei and one of their ex-Scouter sir joining in. It was getting kinda awkward; firstly since I've never been close to at least 2 people on that table, and secondly their former Scouter was a complete stranger to me.

Surprisingly, it turned out much better than expected. Meeting up with old friends (and in turn their companions) is something I dread, especially ones you haven't kept in touch or seen for so long that you've drifted too far out of each other's life to be able to relate and connect with substantially. Which would translate into awkward briefs of silence and resorting to fillers like the weather ("Been raining quite a lot these days huh?" "Yeah, that's true." "Yeah...") and jobs ("So what do you do now?" "The same - ..." "Oh" "Yeah.").

Of course there were those awkward pauses when everyone momentarily runs out of conversational topics, and I was a little self-conscious too, feeling as I'm an outsider attempting to push into another's clique. But they didn't last long. And apparently time seems to be kinder on others' impression/memory of you. Everyone at the table was treating me fairly well, even those whom I've barely exchanged more than 20 words during school last time other than the usual pleasantries. Almost everyone also shook hands as they arrived and left, which left me scratching my head a bit. Guess I'm quite a stranger at this meeting up with old friends thingie

I must be sounding a lil' like a broken record by now, but it never ceases to amaze me to see a friend after a long period of time. They looked a little older, relaxed and mature; but still with bits that allude to their former selves as you remembered them. And it's also interesting to see how a certain someone turned out - contrasting their present pursuits with their past selves. From those days of being a carefree student to a *gulp* working adult. Like who'd picture a reckless outdoorsy guy doing a PhD in science ? And the topics of conversation, well naturally it went from current occupations to listing other old friend and what they're up to now. And of course on a guys-only table, it also went to social status (ie. girlfriends) and physical (ie. losing weight and building muscles). I kid you not, I strongly believe it's due to Hollywood's brainwashing where beautiful guys and girls are a dime a dozen and looking average is an exception. Not to mention the recently published and much-awaited Cleo issue with The 50 Most Eligible Bachelors. It's not easy being a guy these days - we have to dedicate as much attention to our physical aspect as much as our career and play. What happened to the good ol' days of merely bringing home the roti?

Sigh... Anyway, I realised that after taking a small step of initiating contact with former acquaintances, that it isn't that scary. And the results can be really rewarding. Guess my extremely-late-new-year-resolution would be to take up more initiative on asking out friends, both old and current.

He's not just incompetent, he's...

2008-04-17T21:52:00.000+08:00

Disclaimer: Semi-long, not very bitchy post ahead

Finally, on the advice of many and not able to stand it anymore, last weekI told X directly that he needs to do his part around the lab too - "After you finish your work, please fill up the empty tips boxes." "See that bottle of PCR tubes running out? Here's what we do to refill them." Etc etc.

Some people to whom I bitch about X would like to point out that perhaps its cultural differences. Look, I'm also one for benefit of the doubt, but I believe 'cultural differences' can only be excused to a certain extent when it comes to his incompetencies and err.. I have no words for this. Consider this *little* incident this morning.

***

X: The eppendorf (1.5 ml) tubes are finished. *grabs a nearby beaker of those tubes* Can I use these?

Me: No. See the tape here? *points at the tape on the beaker* This is packed by Ros. It's not packed by me, S (my labmate), or you. So you can't use them.

X: But no more tubes.

Me. Yes...Which is why we refill and make new bottles of tubes.

X. Yes, yes. I made new bottle last week (Actually it's we, when I was showing him where the bag of tubes are and how to do the refilling).

Me. Right.. *speaking slowly and deliberately* And then we (I) autoclave them, and autoclaved things go to the...?

(Autoclaving is a sterilising process of heating at 121 C for 15 minutes, and since it's with water, the things mostly end up wet. And then they need to be dried in the oven)

X: To the oven.

Me: Right... So go check the oven.

X: But I checked oven. Not found.

Me. *getting annoyed* Really?

(Now I know for sure that it's in the oven, since after autoclaving I put it in the oven together with other things last Friday after autoclaving. While he as usual just deigns to drop by the lab just to do his work only, period, and left almost immediately after that. And these past days I haven't been around the lab much since I'm almost done with labwork and moving on more to computer analyses, so I haven't really helped out around the lab much.)

Me: Let's go check the oven now. *takes a pair of gloves*

X: *following me* I checked oven every day. Not found.

Me: Mm-hmm. *straps on gloves a little impatiently in front of the oven*

(I was still strapping on the gloves, perhaps a little angrily. X opened the oven, and then thinks to start shifting the large bottles in the front . And finally, he pulled out a large bottle of tubes).

X: Ah. Our bottle of tubes *showing me the bottle with his name on it*

Me: Mm-hmm *I'm not the one with an eyesight problem and lack of common sense. Why show me the bottle?*

X. I check every day. Not found before.

Me. Yeah... *rolls eye. Seriously, who're you trying to kid here?*

***

And this other incident last week...

Me: If you're free now go check the oven and see if there's anything there that's dry; and take them out.

X: Ok. *comes back a few moments later empty-handed*

Me: *suspiciously* Did you check the oven?

X: Yes, yes. Nothing dried yet.

Me: Really? Hmm *very suspicious*

(Since I put in several things the day before, and there should be some things that have dried. I finished my work about 10 minutes later and went to check the oven. In the front, several large bottles were still wet. I moved them aside, and checked the smaller bottles behind them - some of them are dried. Then I checked the top shelf/compartment - all the pipette tips boxes were dried. In the end I had two basketful of items, which I promptly marched right up to X.)

Me: *holds up the two baskets* These things are all dried in the oven.

X: Oh... I saw the big bottles; still wet.

Me. Aha...*rolls eyes*

***

By the way, I just found out that his degree was in veterinary science, and so was his Masters. And I'd appreciate if anyone can point me towards any cheap, over-the-counter high-blood pressure medication.

2008-04-13T21:09:00.002+08:00

I'm not one for throwing up a big fuss about my birthday. Yeah, it's a special day for me - one which I do look forward to with just the slightest hint of excitement, but not one which I planned out an elaborate 24 hours non-stop party. But I've to admit, I was slightly disappointed this time around.

The day before I decided to take half a day off to just chill a bit and get some items. I got down to Midvalley in the afternoon and caught The Spiderwick Chronicles, which was actually rather good. Hmm, the crop of fantasy movies these days seemed to have really improved, focusing more on coherent and well-developed storyline and characters rather than just CGI wizardry. I also got One Republic's album, Dreaming Out Loud, which is quite... unique. In the sense that I've never bought an album of this sorta genre before. It sounded quite good, and they remind me of a slightly more mature and pleasant-sounding version of All-American Rejects, where its lead singers high-pitch singing is a lil' grating for me. Then I also received a call from an old F6 friend who asked me for dinner the next day, which I agreed to.

I woke up that day with a sore throat and feeling a slight flu coming up - not a good sign. So I quickly took up some Strepsils, and got to work. I also decided to postpone dinner with my friend for today as it'll be quite tiring for me to travel back and forth from KL. Later during lunch, I went out for McD's with my colleagues, where they kindly got me a slice of cake. Later in the evening, my colleagues and I went to visit another colleague who had just given birth a few weeks ago. We left rather late, and I was quite tired. So I just got a quick dinner and went to bed early.

Sure I got some well-wishes from friends and acquaintances, not to mention a great postponed-dinner at Pizza Hut with a cake and presents to boot! Which I'm really grateful and appreciative of. But I'm just a little disappointed that I didn't hear even a peep from some of my closest and oldest friends. Perhaps it'd just slipped their mind. Not that I'm taking it as a point-blank sign to sever all friendships, but it does get me down a little.

This weekend I came back, hoping to go out with some friends. Unfortunately, things on the social front was a little quiet. I then tried to find someone for lunch, and even that was almost unsuccessful. Remember how I said the littlest things then to get to you. I was really feeling quite sad and... lonely. Thank god I eventually found someone for lunch; and it was really much more enjoyable than I expected.

Sigh... I need more friends.

Labmate from hell

2008-04-03T21:13:00.003+08:00

Warning: Long, bitchy post ahead.

Those who are have been around me for the past few weeks or so would know that my biggest gripe and whine currently would be this labmate from hell - a middle-east guy who's doing PhD also under my supervisor. Now there's been a bunch of middle-eastern students in my uni, I think due to a special memorandum of cooperation or something. The main bone of contention is that they are doing post-grad studies without a degree in molecular biology (which is a wide aspect of biotechnology). So them being here, they haven't do labwork like we do before. They have zero knowledge on the theory and understanding of what we do. It's like asking a high-school kid to split atoms by pressing a sequence of buttons on a machine, without him knowing what's actually going on.

So then I have this labmate from hell - X. First off the bat, he doesn't know anything. Like how to use a micropipette which is used for transferring liquids in the range of 0.1-1000 microlitre (ul). Which would be tantamount to an IT consultant not knowing how use Windows.Or that he's confounded when a protocol for an experiment calls 0.75 ml of buffer (1ml = 1000 ul, you do the simple math) and he comes asking me whether we have a pipettes for that. When I point him to the appropriate one, he spend another good 5 minutes examining it and twirling the liquid volume setting and asking my other colleague for verification.

3 pipettes with different volume ranges

Using a pipette

So maybe he doesn't know all that as he's never used them before. But pardon me, isn't he supposed to be a PhD student? Well, Wikipedia is has become quite comprehensive and a quick reference point. Still struggling with measurements of ml and ul? Quite a few times actually, like when he's supposed to take 3.25 ml and he used the 100-1000ul pipette set to 325 ul. I keep asking reminding him again and again he needs to take 3.25 ml and he shows me the 325 ul on the pipette, "Yes, yes. 325". I swear I was about to explode, thankfully some divine force granted him enlightenment soon after.

X doesn't read manuals carefully and write down the steps in simplified flow-chart, so that the experiment can be done smoothly without errors. Which is like defusing a bomb while reading long winding lines of the manual. Or preparing certain things needed before starting (which I suppose, could *possibly* be known from reading the manual carefully and planning your work in a simple flow-chart). Kinda like how you usually take out the chicken half an hour before cooking and turning on the oil a few minutes earlier for it to heat.

There was this time he wanted to start work using a new reagent kit which we've never used before, and I told (again and again) him to read the manual carefully first. And he goes with his usual "Yes, yes".

I took a quick glance at the steps and asked him, "What about these temperatures for incubation? Have you turned on the machines yet?" (These machines also takes time to heat up/cool down to a specific temperature, which is why they need to be turned on earlier).

"I haven't used these machines before. Where are these machines? How do you use them?"

I went ##!!@@@$$ inside.

Then there are things in the lab which we all used in shared fashion. An analogy would be a kitchen with a few cooks - usually there'll be a big bottle of sauce, or even chopped garlic in a jar. Usually there's no written rule on who should refill the sauce bottle or chop garlic, people just understand and take turns doing it. Well, in my case X just used them but have never tried or asked to refill things he used. That nice big bottle of TAE buffer running low - never bothered to ask where it came from. Little plastic PCR and microcentrifuge tubes nicely sterilised and packed in bottles (with names of the people who packed them), he probably chalked it up to little lab-elves that come out at night.

And then there's also the pipette tips, which is used in conjunction with the micropippete to transfer liquids. Each time you do a transfer, you use one tip. Which is actually quite bad fro the environment cos it's plastic and you can use up to 5-6 tips to mix liquids to prepare for a single reaction in a tube. So anyway these tips are usually used up pretty quickly. We keep a large basket of these boxes of pipette tips which has been filled up and autoclaved (sterilised). And then a few boxes are placed on the workbench and whoever's doing work there will use them. Then the empty boxes are put aside and after it piles up, they'll be refilled, autoclaved and returned to the big basket.

A typical box of pipette tips

X knows about the big basket, he goes and dig up a new box when it runs out. And I've refilled the pipette tips in front of him at least 3 times (twice on purpose). Yet he has never deigned to refill those empty boxes. Sure he may not use as much as us, but who's keeping count? Couldn't he have done it, perhaps out of courtesy? Or goodwill since he does rely on me and my colleague a lot?

Like yesterday and today's incident. Now our lab is undergoing renovation, so we had to move to another lab and I just took a few boxes that we've been using, so they're about less than half of tips inside. Late in the evening I started to refill the some of the empty boxes (around 9 boxes). He was doing some work halfway when the tips ran out and he ask me whether he can use the ones I've refilled; I told him no, they haven't been autoclaved. So I asked him to borrow some tips from others as the big basket of tips is in our old lab and it's quite troublesome to take them. He proceeded to do just that and went home straight after that. Not even a simple, "Need some help filling up the tips?' Not to mention that I've actually finished my work for the day and had just refilled the tips to pass the time cos he wasn't finish and to leave him unattended in a lab is like letting Chucky run free in a nursery.

The next morning, I started to seal them and label the boxes for autoclaving. He came in and started to asked me all sorts of questions. I just told him to wait. I go about cleaning, labelling, and what-nots before settling down and guiding him from A-Z on what he needs to do that day - which in this case happens to bee a simple procedure which can only be done in the evening due to time factor etc. So he went back immediately. Then I noticed there were 2 more boxes of tips which only has a few left and so I took out the bag of tips to refill them later. But I got busy with my work and left them there, near his table. Later in the evening, he returned to do his work which requires quite a lot of tips. He noticed the box of pipettes (with the bag of tips just next to it) had only a few left, so he shoved it aside and take a new box (which I've taken from the big basket at our old lab earlier). Then he go about his work, finished, asked me a few questions on what to do tomorrow, spent about 10 minutes trying to understand what to do tomorrow, and then left. All the while with 2 nearly-empty box and a bag of pipette tips just next to him.

I dunno about you, but for me when you're starting out in a new workplace or office, you usually try to pick up what your colleagues are doing around the office. And you try to be more helpful with things to learn more and get into your colleagues' good books, especially since you'll be depending on them a lot initially. Like when we were undergrads doing our labwork for thesis, we helped filled out countless tips and helped around the lab cos, well we were very dependent on our seniors there. And when I started out last year, I did the same thing as the new guy, to learn more about the lab, and to foster goodwill with my new colleagues.

In my case, he depends on us 99.99% of the time. Not just how to do things, but what to do. "What do I do after this? What to do next?" The only time he ever asked about a buffer or kit is when he needs to use them and he ask whether they're already prepared (which mostly is) and they're found them.

Am I asking for much? Is he really that dumb that he's not aware of things like these? Do I need to tell him directly to his face in billboard-sized letters that he needs to move his ass around the lab too? Does he somehow assumes that it's my job to keep things on the ready in the lab since I'm just a research assistant and he's a *coughs* Phd. student? Which is utterly stupid, cos he know I'm also working on my own project and he also gets paid under a GRA scheme (graduate research assistant). More actually, since he technically has a Master's.

There are plenty more things about him that drives me up the wall, but to go over all of them would probably result in a book thicker than the Lord of the Rings trilogy.

Racial confusion

2008-03-29T21:30:00.003+08:00

Yesterday I decided to get up a bit earlier to the lab, the make a quick stopover at a nasi lemak stall on the way. One of my colleagues had recommended it; I tried a bite and it wasn't too bad. A few days ago I wanted to try it but unfortunately it was sold out.

Well, I was in luck this time - it was almost finished and she was gonna close shop already. As she was dishing out the rice and condiments, we made conversation like whether I'm studying and where I'm heading. And then suddenly she she popped this question.

"Adik ni Melayu ke Cina?"

I was practically stunned. This was totally a first for me and out of nowhere. So I was like, "Huh? Apa dia?

"Adik ni, bangsa Cina atau bangsa Melayu?"

I managed to get my head back, and decided to play along. "Kak rasa saya ni nampak macam Cina ke atau Melayu?"

"Cina ada, Melayu pun ada." She answered shyly. I gotta admit, I was practically laughing my ass out inside. As she was packing up the nasi lemak, I told her that I was really Chinese, aesthetically at least.

My colleague and I had a good laugh about it later. What made this incident hilarious was that this was the first time I've ever been asked this question.

I recalled how during uni where 99.99% of the time, a Chinese dude will strike up a conversation with me in Mandarin, if they happen to be a complete stranger or don't know me well enough. Or the time when I mentioned that I've never went to a Chinese school, they looked aghast and shocked beyond words. Which is probably not too far from how most of our politicians looked when they saw the results of the recent General Election.

When I mentioned this to my friend, he said that's because I have a, to put it crudely, a typical Chinese. With slit eyes and rather fair skin and all. Hehe, I guess the kakak above would disagree with him.

2008-03-23T22:12:00.001+08:00

Just woke up bout an hour ago, completely exhausted. This has been a long and somewhat unanticipated type of weekend. I was quite gung ho bout using this weekend to work on my attachment proposal, manuscript and put in some extra lab hours, since I got some pretty good results on Friday. Let's rewind...

So I was sitting there as prettily as can be just doing work in the lab when a friend suggested we meet up in SS2 for the night. So I thought *fine*, since I have a whole day tomorrow to catch up on work. Unfortunately, as I was driving by on the right lane on the stretch of road of Jalan Universiti (I think)-SS2 which is really dark, and I went over a really, really deep pothole. Like seriously, and I was like *oh shit*. I could hear the sound of something sliding off below my car and next thing I know, there is a loud rattling sound as I continued driving. Immediately I pulled by the road side and checked briefly. The tires looked fine, and well it's not like I can slide in under my car to take a look.

So I took a deep breath and considered my options - get the car fixed right now or continue driving. Option 1 is a little hard as I'm not sure where is the nearest workshop, and whether it's still open at this hour. So hoping for the best and crossing my fingers, I chose option 2. So then I drove a little bit further, albeit very slowly and the rattling sound getting extremely with any speed increases, I reached SS2. And as I parked my car, I realised the reverse gear wasn't working too well; I need to step on the gas to get the car to move in reverse. Anyway I met with my friend and asked if he could put me up for the night and and then next morning I could find a workshop. Thankfully he was totally cool about it. And me being me, I could only snatched a few hours of sleep before giving up and surfing aimlessly online.

Which led to some workshop-hunting this morning. The ones we saw at SS2 weren't open, and then my friend suggested one near KDU which luckily was open. All the while I was really worried about the cost of repairs, me imagining the gear box/clutch/what-nots thingamajic being severely damaged. Turns out that the suspension, car chamber etc was damaged...and it cost around RM250. Well, I guess (sorta thankfully) that it's not a huge amount, but it's still a dent in my pocket. And one of the tyre rim was also damaged and needs to be fixed, or worse, replaced, and that cost is still not known.

Sigh...as if I'm not broke enough already with getting a new monitor. And here I was so glad that this month I was running on healthy surplus and meeting my budget.

2008-03-20T23:02:00.001+08:00

So sad...and so broke. Just spend around 500 bucks to get a new monitor. My old one just upped and smoked last night. I found out that monitors usually come with 3-year warranties, and mine just expired like 2 months ago. The unfairness of it all!! Though I'm quite enjoying my new monitor and all - a 17" LG LCD monitor, which is larger, sharper and more vibrant than my old one.

And I also realised how dependent I have been on my comp. Without it I was feeling bored pretty quickly, and the bright side would be I managed to be quite productive without my a computer screen staring in front me.

2008-03-19T01:16:00.002+08:00

Song: Say It Again - Marie Digby

Unless you have been stuck in an underground bomb shelter, chances are that anyone who's a citizen of this fair country would be aware of the massive changes in our political landscape. Most notably, BN has been denied its 2/3rd majority in Parliament, and 5 states are now being governed by the the loose coalition of DAP-PKR-PAS. This has also gotta be the most exciting election ever, with it being my very first one, heh. I was logged on to Malaysiakini and following the updates by the minute - XXX leading in area YYY; Opposition in trailing closely in state Z. It was pretty damn exciting, I tell you! And exhilarating too, as one by one the states fell - Penang, Kedah, Selangor (!). I followed till 2 am, with the final breaking piece of news of Perak falling into the opposition.

The local mainstream's seemed to have a (poorly) hidden agenda of provoking the loose coalition and painting it the most negative light possible, while at the same time giving (undue) positive spotlight on the BN. So lately I've avoided reading the local newspapers like The Star/NST (though The Sun is one of the few independent ones), and choose to source my news from sites like Malaysia Today and KTemoc Konsiders.

Perhaps some of you might be wondering the rather dearth mentioning of the general election prior in the last few weeks. Well, I sincerely doubt that but I'll go on anyway. As much as I do try to keep somewhat abreast of the political happenings locally, at heart I'm not a political activist. Sure I might mention it bits of politics and social happenings here, but I'm a pale comparison to individuals like Daniel and Shi Jun. I guess I'm more concerned with the environment, and perhaps one day I might actually take up the mantle of an animal/enviromental activist.

But on to myself, things are just generally alright. I've been making some progress in my lab research, so at least I'm moving forward. Nothing else of interest happening lately, other than the recent St. Patrick's Day which originated from Ireland and now is just a good excuse for people from other countries to drink themselves silly. Here's how a high-profile local 'celebrity' celebrated it.

2008-03-03T18:14:00.003+08:00

Song: Bleeding Love - Leona Lewis

Sometimes we forget how the little things can rankle you for a disproportionately long time. Like yesterday night when I wanted to refill supply of drinking water at one of those RO water vending machines that's getting quite inconspicuous these days. So I brought along my bottles and a slightly larger amount of coins than needed.

There were 3 of those machines side by side, and luck would have it that the one I picked happened to be spoiled that very day. It swallowed in my coins but won't discharge any water. And I have with me 3 empty bottles with few coins left. Hating to return to my room just to get more coins, I decided to change a RM1 note which I happened to have with me.

So I went into my college cafetaria. Sitting at the counter was the owner, a near middle-aged guy, chatting with a young lady worker. And so I asked if I could change some coins. "Duit syling tak ada," he answered gruffly, when it was in plain sight that even a naked mole rat could see, was large stacks of coins lying in the opened cash register. I was quite annoyed, and asked again, "Seringgit pun tak boleh?". He then decided to liken my existence to an annoying gnat and just looked around in a nonchalant, bored way. I stared at him and then to the lady worker next to him, who at least had the decency to look slightly embarassed.

I mean I can totally understand if he doesn't want to change, something along the lines of "Oh, kami nak guna syiling untuk esok" or even a short "Sorry, tak boleh tukar duit syiling" would have been kinda acceptable. But to blatantly lie , rather rudely, and then ignoring me was seriously in bad taste. What ever happened to customer service, or even decent manners?

Well, I've never been much of a fan of this new cafetaria management that took over this semester. The previous management was quite good actually, lots of food variety and quite tasty too. This current owner had less than half the variety of food, poorly stocked bread/snacks/drinks, and just alright food. Like during lunch hour, it will be packed and semi-packed during dinner that I usually plan my way around the crowd if I want to go to the cafe. Right now, it barely picks up the few stragglers here and there. With this kind customer service, I won't be sorry at all to wish its speedy demise.

2008-02-24T23:13:00.005+08:00

Current song: Teardrops On My Guitar - Taylor Swift; Stop and Stare - One Republic

Came back home this weekend to grab some stuff and go out. Strangely I've been in a rather... whimsical mood this entire week, for lack of a better word. There are tons of better things I could do, but I just took it rather easy and just went along, tacking bits of work here and there.

And oh, the first general election has just been anounced. Yay, my first election ever! Hehe, can't wait to exercise my citizenship right and civic duty.

And on another note, there's a movie that looks quite interesting to me. Generally I avoid spoof and parody movies, given that Meet the Spartans got thrashed and beaten to a bloody pulp by critics and movie-goers. Case in point, Mafia remains the worse movie I've ever seen in a cineplex. However, this trailer does look promising - staying away from the current trend of parodies of just spoofing nonsensically without any coherent storyline, and it features Drake Bell. Who was a child star with an early exposure on Nickelodeon, and co-starring with Amanda Bynes on The Amanda Show. (Yes, I admit it - I do watch Nickelodeon and Disney Channel). Click on the trailer below.

2008-02-14T15:33:00.003+08:00

A bit late, but Happy Chinese New Year folks.

CNY this time wasn't that bad. I took leave on CNY eve (Wednesday), and also the following Monday and Tuesday. I've kinda forgotten how relaxing it has been to just chill for a long period of time, guess I've been racking up too much overtime in the weekends. And the usual CNY delicacies of course - like pineapple tarts (from Malacca), long yuk (dried pork), and love letters. And my dad even took us out on sushi. Yay!

Was thinking this time CNY would be quite boring and lonely, but didn't turn out so bad. On the third day, went out with a friend who was visiting her aunt. Ended up with choc-fuls of well, chocolates. Apparently her aunt had came back from UK laden with lots of chocolate. Got to sample lots of delicious chocolate - including large chocolate coins, chocolate with rum and lots more. And here I thought Ferrero Rocher only comes in one flavour - the dark chocolate with slight mint was excellent.

The next day, went to another friend's place again, and bumped into an old friend who was seeing one of my friends there. Damn, it has been what, 4 years since I've seen him? I seriously hate being reminded how old I am, and still amazed at how much time has passed since I stepped out of form 5.

Anyway I watched them played mahjong for a while, me never learning how to play myself. Watched them for a few rounds, and the rules and even the aims of the game still escapes me though I can sorta get what they're trying to to to win. After that we played gin rummy (I think that's how it's spelled) which I've never played before but watched my dad did a long time ago.

With all four of us of the same age, it was 4 rats squaring off. Which one of us would emerge as the top rat? Turns out I was the under-rat of it, as I lost more than 10 bucks after a couple of rounds. While my friend managed to loot more than 10 bucks (with me as the major contributor), plus an additional 10 bucks from the previous mahjong rounds. Sigh.. Maybe a red Mickey Mouse underwear would have done the trick to up my lucky star.

Anyhow, me back to work already right now, and am greeted with the sudden news that one of my colleague is leaving by the end of the week. Yikes! Now the lab's gonna be even more desolate. Not to mention she was the most senior one around, so we usually ask her stuff and its whereabouts and how-tos. Guess I'll have to take up bit more work from now on.

Here's me going to stuff myself on some CNY cookies I stowed away to my room.

The Hitcher

2008-02-04T10:46:00.000+08:00

No, not the horror slasher movie of a couple who picked up a psychopathic hitchhiker. But I was in car with a complete strange. Just the two of us. For about 20 minutes...

So it goes like this. I pulled some extra work at my lab yesterday, and came back to my college around 6 pm. I had just turned the engine down and was putting up the sunshade when I spotted this guy walking near my direction. A Chinese dude, but doesn't look local. Likely from the batch of students from China that recently came to UKM. (And I just realised that 'Chinese' here has multiple contexts - foreigners use it to refer to people that came from China, I use it to refer to the stereotypical fairer-skin/slit-eyed populace in Malaysia).

Anyway, I was about to get off my car when suddenly he knocked on my window. Thinking maybe he needs some direction, I just opened the door. And then he asked in, in Mandarin obviously,

"Might I trouble you to give me ride to KTM station to buy some food?"

Though likely I'm making up half the sentence, since my Mandarin's like really bad, and I could only figure out that sentence by the words 'trouble', 'KTM', 'buy' and 'food'. And there were some other things he mentioned afterwards which I couldn't get. Anyway, near the KTM station there are some Chinese mix rice, which is quite popular among the Chinese students in UKM as it's rather near and cheap.

So anyway, I was faced with a decision. A complete stranger asking me to give him a ride. Stories of psychopathic killers, muggers with knife briefly flashed my mind. But he does look like a regular guy and harmless. And I'm partial to helping out people who need a ride as I was in their shoes not too long ago and know how inconveniencing it is. And it really has to take a lot of guts, not to mention pride, for him to actually ask a stranger for a ride. In his mind, I in turn might be the crazed killer (though from what 99% of friends tell me, I look too innocent to be considered a threat). After careful deliberation for a few seconds, I obliged and he got into my car.

And so we chatted, sorta. Have I mentioned that my mandarin is bad? And on top of that, his Mandarin also has a slight accent to it. But somehow we managed somewhat with my badly-pronounced and grammatically-erred Mandarin. And most likely half the time I was understanding him wrong and spewing nonsensical Greek to him. If I did, he played the part of a gracious passenger and responded appropriately, even feigning surprise when I told him that I don't really know Mandarin and I speak mostly in other languages.

Bits of conversation which I can state quite confidently as indeed being spoken about include: the course he's studying (IT), his intention to buy car, and him not adapting to the cafetaria food. When we returned, he thanked me profusely for the lift. I just smiled and assured him it was nothing. Ah... it certainly feels great to do a good deed. And that my instincts weren't wrong on giving him a ride.

Edit p/s:
My short encounter with him also made me realise how different, contextually, we are despite sharing a common racial descendant. He asked me whether both of my parents were Chinese (probably because I suck in Mandarin) and whether they were born in Malaysia. I'm not one for tracing my family tree, but I vaguely remember mentions of my grandparents or greatgrandparents arriving in Malaysia. So technically I'm at least the second generation being born and bred here, and he was slightly fascinated by this.

He also asked me whether the food stall was opened by a "China-ian (?)" (pardon my lack of han yi ping yin, what he said chung-quo-ren ". I was slightly surprised, and I replied by a "Yeah, by a Chinese (hua-ren)". Again, the context of the word "Chinese" is vastly different between me and him. As far as I know, no Malaysian Chinese refer to him or herself as "chung-quo-ren", but as "hua-ren" regardless of the many types of clans and dialects available. Likely because the former has a connotation to China, despite both words also means Chinese (the stereotypical definition of fair-skinned/slit-eyed people across Asia).

I guess subconciously, the majority of the Chinese populace of Malaysia was brought up and grew here, mingling with other races and embracing the culture here. That we've diverged so far from the first settlers who arrived here that we no longer identify with China or it being "the great motherland" or something like that. Which is what really angers me when a few years ago, we were labled as "pendatang" and told that "kalau tak suka, baliklah China". Which is insulting, as it implies we're not considered full citizens here. There is no other place to go to, no homeland which we harbour a secret desire to return to. It's time politicians and everyone in Malaysia realise that we're all Malaysians, irrespective of skin colour; and that we're all here together, for better or worse.

2008-01-23T10:50:00.000+08:00

A friend just flew back to continue his studies, and we managed to meet up along with a few others old friends. I believe there's something intangible and perhaps entirely magical about old friends. That meeting them after a long time never fails to bring up a smile on your face as you reminisce about the past and talking about the current over drinks at the roadside mamak.

I am 69% Addicted to Coffee

Here it is - my very own coffee addiction rating. 69%... seems quited alright to me. That is from a slightly-biased-personal-opinion of a coffee addict.

WHAT MAJOR IS RIGHT FOR YOU?
created with QuizFarm.com

You scored as Biology/Chemistry/Geology

You should strongly consider majoring (or minoring) in Biology, Chemistry, Geology, or related majors (e.g., Biochemistry, Environmental Science, Forestry, Fisheries and Wildlife, Genetics, Marine Biology, Zoology).

It is possible that the best major for you is your 2nd, 3rd, or even 5th listed category, so be sure to consider ALL majors in your OTHER high scoring categories (below). You may score high in a category you didnt think you would--it is possible that a great major for you is something you once dismissed as not for you. The right major for you will be something 1) you love and enjoy and 2) are really great at it.

Consider adding a minor or double majoring to make yourself standout and to combine your interests. Please post your results in your myspace/blog/journal.

Biology/Chemistry/Geology

81%

English/Journalism/Comm

75%

French/Spanish/OtherLanguage

69%

Religion/Theology

63%

PoliticalScience/Philosophy

63%

History/Anthropology/LiberalArts

56%

HR/BusinessManagement

50%

Psychology/Sociology

50%

Mathematics/Statistics

50%

Accounting/Finance/Marketing

44%

Nursing/AthleticTraining/Health

44%

Education/Counseling

38%

Physics/Engineering/Computer

38%

Visual&PerformingArts

38%

And yeah, I'm a fickle one.

Ponder

2008-01-01T11:54:00.000+08:00

Guess it's that time of year again huh? A year ends, another one begins. Time for one to look back on the previous year; the ups and downs. Wondering if one had been changed by it, for better or worse. I thought I'd do a recap for the previous year, seeing as I've skipped the last one.

The year started off pretty alright. I was in my final semester and busy with my thesis. Towards the month before my thesis, I was surviving on three cups of coffee and less than six hours of sleep daily. Finally did manage to complete my thesis and got an A for it, so my efforts were not for naught.

And how could I forget that thing that cropped up with that stupid (former) friend? That got me all angry and confused the night before my final paper. How could someone be so selfish and silly to end a friendship just because things turned out differently than expected. Three years down the road, and again I got burned by an incident involving individuals who supposedly are people whom you're close to and can trust. Thankfully I did get an A for that paper, despite me getting quite distraught and barely able to grab any sleep that night.

With my stint at university done, it's time to step out into the real world. And honestly, it's a very daunting and terrifying step. Even when I was busy with my thesis, I heard tales of who & who securing for jobs etc. And like most people, I wasn't exactly sure what to do; afraid of taking a wrong step. Sure I had a rough idea what I want to do; but when you're actually at that point and then so many options suddenly opens up, hesitations and doubt begin creeping in.

Just to see how well I could do, I applied for HSBC's Management Development Programme. It was actually rather tough, but it was a good learning albeit nerve-wrecking experience. And when I was actually offered the position, it put me in dilemma. Steady job, good pay and a nice start up the corporate ladder vs the rocky, less-known path of academia and research. In the end, whether out of defiance of conformation, temporary lapse of judgment or plain stubbornness, I turned down the offer for a low-paying temp position as a research assistant in my uni.

Although I've done it twice, I don't think I'll ever get the hang of it - walking away from something and the people whom you practically spent most of your time with for the past few years. Leaving behind people whom I've shared good times with, helped each other with during trying times of lab reports and exams. Or people who I've gotten so close with that I'm at ease to be just be kick back and let loose myself, sarcasm and indignance and all. Individuals who I've spent so much time with through countless debate trainings, tourneys and goofing around; unwittingly a bond develops that is so much more than mere friendship. Through the stress, doubts, misunderstandings, and even tears that ensues; it opens up a side of someone that is rarely seen. And when it's all over and done with, inevitably a whole new level of understanding and trust develops that brings people even closer.

It's hard too, to realise that your time is up and you have to walk away from something you've dedicated so much of energy and time into. To now stand behind the line and watch others do it, only able to offer a small portion of moral support and advice to them. Perhaps out of dedication and love for the people and the sport, or an excuse for a reason to still be around with the people you like, or just a fleeting and futile attempt to capture some of the thrill long gone.

And so 2007 has been a year of big changes of some self-contemplation. Where a period of my life is over and a new phase begins. Can't say I've been looking forward to 2008; it just marks the beginning of another period of the Gregorian calendar. But I do hope that this path I started on would be one that offers what I seek at the end with few regrets.

Happy New Year folks. May you all be blessed with good cheer, love, luck and whatever else you're looking for. And may you all too that climate change is already happening and is here to stay.

2007-12-15T01:39:00.000+08:00

My, it's been quite a while since my last post. Just some short scribbles here. Came back from dinner with some old form 6 friends. FREE dinner at Pizza Hut actually, courtesy of a friend who's working there. Yay! It was great meeting up and chatting with them, and then realising how outdated I am with their current lives. My fault actually, me rarely keeping in touch with them. Promised myself that I'll do that more often from now on. And also shocking news that one of my former schoolmate will be getting married soon. Yikes!! That news took everyone on the table by surprise, and mostly not in a good way.

Maybe it's just me, but when you're bored and your social calendar is empty, it really is the pits - no one calls you out and anyone you try asking is somehow unavailable.

And then when it picks up, it really spirals to the top. And suddenly you have to arrange plans to prevent them from clashing, and also turning down the extra invites. This looks set to be a busy weekend.

2007-12-02T23:45:00.000+08:00

Went out yesterday with an old friend who came back for holidays. Had quite a good time just catching up, with the dash of usual silliness and lameness. Then went back to his place, basically just chilling with surfing the net, watching tv, and playing PS.

After that went out for dinner again at SS2 Murni. Haven't been there in ages, like in bout 2-3 years? Food there has always been great, the few times I've been there. Tried out a friend's recommendation of their claypot lou shu fan, which turned out to be really good.

It's really great to just spend a big part of a day with someone who you've known for a large part of your life, and just kick back and practically do nothing. All in all it was a good weekend.

2007-11-27T23:00:00.000+08:00

Often when we get too close and comfortable with someone, we take each other for granted. Like they said, familiarity breeds contempt.

And when it reaches a tipping point, a resolution is needed and everyone has to swallow the bitter pill - being frank. And if the initial bond was strong enough, a new level of understanding and closeness is reached. Everyone moves on, contented and satisfied.

And sometimes when you're unexpectedly appreciated by the very people whom you care deeply for, it means so much more than an expensive gift. The profound sense of being needed and belonged. And that your existence mattered.

And then everything in life seems so much better.

Whirlpools

2007-11-25T02:12:00.000+08:00

I've just finished saving up all my old blog entries over at Blog-city. In case you didn't know, Blog-city had decided to terminate its free hosting of blogs and will only be available to paid bloggers, and all free blogs will be terminated by end of this year. So then I upped and moved over here to Blogspot.

Anyway, I was skimming through those entries as I saved them up, and a whole lot of emotions just washed up over me. I can't believe that it's been almost 4 years that I've started this blog. How my writing has changed over the years, and even how myself has changed over the years. Things I went through, good times and bad; my thought over certain issues and so on.

With my very first post around the time I just finished Form 6, I think I might have came across as rather idealistic. That time I was thinking of going on adventurous treks to study animals. And then once I entered UKM, things changed. My passion for the environment, I think, has decreased slightly. I still plan to help the environment, though my approach now would be studying and understanding it through a different approach.

At that time too, I was just still fresh off from certain issues. I had a lot of anger, and confusion. And being dumped into a new environment of entering into uni probably didn't help much in thawing my slightly cool and bitter self. Then there was the whole thing of me definitively drifting further away from my Form 5 friends, a term I've come to accept now.

And I kinda laughed a little at myself, reading bout when I just embarked on this whole new world of 'debating'. How excited I was when I went for my first Royals in UMS and the subsequent victory. The incredibly good times I had, the the amazing bond and friendship that developed with a bunch of the zaniest people I know. People who would become some of the few friends I'm can claim to be totally comfortable with.

The ironic part would be that today the UKM debate team has just left for this year's Royals at UiTM Shah Alam. It feels a bit strange, and nostalgic, I think. I'm not sure of the exact words to describe what I'm feeling now. Seeing some of my closest friends, whom I've spent a lot of time debating and had fun with. Not to mention who were my teammates for last year's Royals, now attempting the whole thing again. This time without me. And mostly with a sense of relunctance and obligation, as compared to the drive and camaraderie we formerly shared. The whole thing just feels a little, surreal? Sad maybe? To see them go at something that I was once a part of. The kind of feeling you get when you see the juniors take over your post and duties. The feeling of an ...outsider, peering inside through a window of the house you walked out of.

And of course, blogging too allowed me to meet a few incredible people; no mention of names needed. Among them is a person who's come to be someone I've gotten really close with. But overall, I guess that personally for me, a blog is like my own diary of sorts - photos that make me smile fondly, entries that trigger long-forgotten memories and emotions. This blog is a story of my journey.

Short ramble at work

2007-11-20T14:24:00.000+08:00

Yesterday was the longest I've stayed in my lab working late. Initially was going to be kinda a busy day till evening, expecting to finish around 5 pm. Unfortunately there was a workshop in the afternoon (which wasn't as boring and quite interesting actually) so around 6 pm went to tapau dinner and went up my lab. Did my work and had dinner and finally left around 9 pm. It was kinda surreal actually, it was pitch black outside the window of my lab. Kinda scary too. The road leading up my lab resembles more to jungle trail and it was really dark, even with the fog lights on.

So with yesterday's sudden burst of dedicatedness on my part, I thought I'd go up to lab a little later today. Unfortunately my lecturer called in the morning just bout 10 minutes before I arrived, thus giving off a bad impression of me as a slacker, never-early dude to office. Which is also quite unfair as my colleague who usually comes much later to me always happen to come early on the days my lecturer calls or just suddenly waltzes in.

Anyway, I'm kinda getting along with my applications and whatnots to for overseas postgrad, thanks to some wonderful tips and support from a few friends. And right now, on a sudden whim, I've decided to go catch a movie and maybe get myself a new pair of shoes to replace my slightly torn ones. So I'm hurrying up my work now and hopefully I can make it in time.

And oh, just remembered this little bit. According to one of my friends, for all my almost constant expressionless state, the one expression I do best is one of indignance. In fact, she added, I practically ooze indignance almost all the time. I'd appreciate if anyone out there would let me know how true is this.

2007-11-12T00:09:00.000+08:00

*Dusts off cobwebs from blog* With that out of the way, here's a short update to show I'm still alive and doing (relatively) well.

Generally, I'm not one who's big on shopping for clothes. I only shop when I need to. Which is mostly the customary one before CNY, and when there's something I need but don't have. And maybe also when there's a sale and I happen to find something I kinda like. But rarely do I actively go shopping.

Succumbing into the societal lure of consumerism and superficiality, I did a little shopping two weeks ago. And I had a friend along with me who doubled as my very own assistant shopper; which was really helpful as I wasn't exactly a favoured of the gods of the fashion pantheon. I got myself a nice semi-checkered brown shirt and a pair of cool Nike walking shoes. This was followed by a push from my said friend to take a step up the social ladder. It wasn't completely unnerving and different than variations of what I've done before, though I do appreciate the effort and sentiment.

And well, that little bit of shopping was the most so far I've spend on a single day for clothes. And now I'm kinda slightly broke and regretful. Ah... the sacrifices we make to look good (or at least trying to). I'm sure all my shopaholic/bimboish/gal-friends are rolling their eyes right now; about time I joined them and fully embrace the glory of malls with their flashy boutiques and what-nots.

Right now, I'm kinda working on a proposal presentation on my research project in preparation for a meeting with some overseas lecturer that will be coming soon. My supervisor's intention is to push me to get a sorta collaboration or co-supervision or twinning programme with them. In the meantime too, I'm still sorting out the whole quagmire of studying overseas, though the maze of application requirements, procedures, funding etc etc. Sigh..nothing is easy in life. But if I want to make something of it, I'll have to work at it.

p/s: In case you were trapped in a bomb shelter last weekend, please click here and here to find out about the biggest thing that happened in our sunny land since maggi goreng mamak.

Our environment

2007-10-15T10:32:00.000+08:00

Today’s entry is a lil’ special Blog Action Day edition. This is where lots and lots of bloggers around the world will be writing about a common theme – this year it’s the environment. I may not be a hugely popular blogger, but I thought I’d do my part. Those who frequent this blog would know that occasionally I do write stuff bout the environment. There are lots of other green blogs (some links provided below) that offers lots of tips on going green etc, so I though I’d tackle another approach – really, why should we care about the environment?

Here’s what I learn from my conservation biology class. There is basically two main factors why humans would conserve the environment:
i. economics
ii. aesthethics

The economics factor is mostly for businesses and corporations. What is the cost of conserving the environment vs. utilizing it now? Things like: Should I cut down this hectare of sturdy mature oak trees to make furniture or should I leave it so that the squirrels and birds can continue to play here? Should I turn this area into a logging haven or do I spend a little to turn it into an ecotourism spot where I earn less but over a longer period?

Aesthetics would be more of the regular Joe’s (including me) and green groups’ reason for protecting the environment – protecting the environment for the sake of protecting it. Eg we should protect the environment because it is wrong to destroy nature. Because all life is sacred and shouldn’t be taken away. Because nature is a wonderful work of beauty and it would be terrible to destroy it. Because man shouldn’t be frivolous with God’s gifts to mankind.

Of course this only represents two extreme viewpoints towards conserving the environment. Corporations hate environmental groups, the groups hate the corporations and government while the government has to struggle between both of them. Nowadays more and more people realize that a compromise is needed to achieve some positive results rather than both sides being stubborn. Green groups need to understand that corporations and also communities, need to see tangible benefits to conserving the environment – their job opportunities, profits etc. While corporations and the local community needs to understand that protecting the environment can also bring tangible benefits in the long run such as sustainable jobs like ecotourism, a more stablised microenvironment (local climate), and better quality of air and water. Think about it – parks in cities aren’t just nice to look at – they provide shade, comfort and reduce dust.

But in the end, really, why should we conserve the environment? Aren’t we doing just fine now? Besides, we’ve got lots of things to do – work, family etc? I agree, that all of us have our own commitments. Not all of us can be like Jane Goodall who just upped and spent half her lifetime with the gorillas. But still there are things that we can do – like being aware and pressure our policymakers to go green.

I think this would be similar to asking why should we should care about the killings of innocents in Darfur. Or victims of the tsunami in Aceh. Or the brutal war in Iraq. How can we expect to grow and prosper in our cosy little bubble when there are some many problems afflicting us. We are growing more interconnected that ever, and things that happen there will affect us as well. Another crisis in Iraq, oil prices will spike. More innocents being killed in Darfur – displacements of refugees and spreading of chaos to other countries.

Which is why even though we might be comfortable now, the environmental problems that occur are warnings of a systemic problem. We should be worried that frogs and amphibians have been dying mysteriously for the past few years, since they live mostly in bodies of water and are more sensitive to changes in the environment. We also should be worried that bees have been dying and not returning to their hives for unknown reasons, causing massive losses to farmer who might not be aware that bees provide free pollination services for almonds, flowers and fruits. Or that the Ant arctic ice this summer has been melting at an alarming rate. Because though we might not feel the effects right now, all signs are pointing that our environment are breaking down. We need to remember that we need the environment more that it needs us; not to mention that it could actually do much better without us.

Let’s do our part, bit by bit. Because when you think about it, at the end of the day we are not doing it so much for Mother Nature herself but for ourselves and our future generations.

Here are some great links to learn more about our environment and how to go green.

i. Treehugger
ii. We can live green
iii. Digg

2007-10-14T23:00:00.000+08:00

It’s getting really difficult to type this entry as there’s something wrong with my keyboard right now. A section of it seems to be not responding – Q, A, Z, tab , ~ and 1. I just got back from dinner with close friend; it’s been quite a while since I’ve had just a simple dinner with a friend and just catching up.

By the way, I’ve already have some ideas for tomorrow’s Blog Action Day, but in the meantime here’s some fun stuff.

2007-10-03T10:40:00.000+08:00

How my luck have swung 180 degrees in less than 24 hours. Yesterday night I find out that all 350 places for the Worlds Debate end of this year has been filled up. Which means my effort thus far has been of naught. Yeah, sure it's not as much as some dedicated debater put in, but I too have taken efforts both personal and physical to prepare for it. Sigh. I just feel so frustrated now. No thanks to UKM's inefficient bureaucracy. Anugerah Kualiti Perdana Menteri 2007, my foot. The Jabatan Hal-Ehwal Pelajar wanting to get ISO certification,to hell with it. Imagine the lady in charge of it twiddling her thumbs away when we've submitted out proposal for months. I can just imagine the multitude of exuses she comes up with every time Jerry goes to the office to bug them - "Alamak, tertinggal lah surat ini masa nak hantar ke pejabat TNC (Timbalan Naib Canselor." "Oh, yang ini urgent ke. Nantilah kak bagi kat XXX. " "Tengah proses lagi, tunggulah." Truly, I can symphathise with him. I really really do not want to just put this behind us. We should at make our grouses known, and the department or at least that individual holding up the bureaucracy should be held accountable. I mean, yeah in the future we'll still need to be in their good books to get their cooperation. But is it fair to have one or few individuals have so much power that the rest of students have to cower in fear all the time? What's to prevent something similar like this from happening again in the future?

Anyway, I also went out yesterday and caught Hairspray. An excellent move - amazing songs, great choregraphy, good direction, and wholly natural and likable characters. Everyone in the move seems to be always so perky and politically-correct yet saucy and witty. It's a wholly feel-good movie where a complex and difficult issue such as racism back in the 1960's was tackled in a light vein with flair and style. Great job all around to the producing crew and actors. Go catch it if you haven't, you'll totally enjoy it.

2007-10-02T14:44:00.000+08:00

Song: Shut Up and Drive - Rihanna

Do you know the wonderful feeling of bumping into an old friend unexpectedly? That really makes your day and you can't wipe that goofy smile off your face later? I just had an amazing lunch. I was going through several lunch options in my head - should I go for the nearby quick economy rice again, or should I take my time and have a long slow lunch at Pizza Hut or McD?

Finally I settled on McD. And as I made my way up the stairs to have my lunch in relative peace, I glanced up a slight guy in blue reading the papers. I chose the table beside the window which happened to be right in front of the guy. I casually glanced at him as he flicked through his paper, and dude, it was HIM! I did a double-take as both of us blinked at each other for a few moments in awkward surprise, and then I joined his table. It was TS, an old secondary school friend I've known since Form 1, which is like, 10 years ago.

Apparently he was in Bangi to meet a client later. Luck has it that he decided to have McDs that day, and me too deciding on the same thing and then chose a table upstairs too. We had a great time catching up bout each other, talking bout some mutual friends, and well, just stuff that came up. I'm really glad to whatever lucky stars/fate/higher being that decided to snap their fingers and made my day.

Rhinos and reform

2007-10-01T10:52:00.000+08:00

It's been a while since I've kept myself updated in the cyberworld (reading news and other blogs of interest) and keeping up with my blog. Partly this is due to me engrossed in this awesome tower-defence stragety game 'Master of Defense'. Second would be due to debates. I went down to Singapore last weekend for Singapore Debate Open in NUS. It was a surprisingly good tournament - the standards of debating was rather high (among them the well-known Tan Wu-Ming 'Worlds' Best Speaker'), and the adjudication standard was quite alright too. Me and my bro got our asses doubly-kicked in the tourney, which is a good reminder of how far we're lagging behind other debate teams. And well, apparently Singaporean unis don't skimp on their meals. On the first day, lunch was a buffet of - flavoured rice, stewed chicken wings, sweet sour fish slices, mixed vegetables, and stir-fried bean curd. With desert consisting of delectable cold cream puffs and chocolate eclairs, and a slurpy ice-cold honeydew/sago in santan syrup. Yum! This lunch alone made the registration fee of S$20 totally worth it.

Anyway, I've updated some links on my blog. I've added 2 new logo links - Save Our Sumatran Rhinos and Blog Action Day. I've to say I honestly don't know much about Sumatran rhinos, the only rhinos I've encountered upclose are the white rhinos when I was doing my stint in Zoo Taiping. Like seriously, when you gaze closely at a rhino, you realised that it's actually a quiet gentle creature. They can spend hours just standing there, nibbling their food slowly (they're herbivores - and we feed them dried grass and pellets. They like the pellets better). Of course if you gaze too closely at them and start taunting them, they probably wouldn't be too gentle with you. You got to remember that they still weigh around 3600 kg and can probably toss you around like a rag doll if they feel like it.

Two rhinos lazing in the shade of their enclosure. I think it's Melur and another female.

There are in Zoo Taiping - the only male and the youngest of the bunch (Badang), and two females (Melur and one whose name I've forgotten, think it might be Mawar). The second female rhino was obtained as part of a conservation programme to help breeding as there had been no successful reproduction between Badang and Melur. But apparently Badang is a little insecure and was outranked with the arrival of two females who had sort of formed a sister pact. Badang wouldn't go near the enclosure if both the females are there; I once saw him nipping his heel when he wanted to join in when they were feeding on the pellets.

But anyway, they're really docile creatures. The keeper once allowed us to go rhino-riding once. Which is actually pretty difficult, I have to say. Climbing on top of the rhino is not easy; they're really tall and wide and it's not like you can have any handholds to grab on. And you have to be pretty sneaky too, you don't want to risk startling the rhino. So anyway, after much huffing and puffing, I manage to scoot myself over on top of Badang (the most docile one) while he was feeding on the pellets. Unfortunately though, I was not as gentle as I thought and he was startled. And for the next 30 seconds, I almost had a near death experience as I tried to hang on to him (with nothing really to hold on to) like a rodeo bull as he leaped about. In the end I managed to made a safe leap down to the side while he bolted out of the enclosure. My friend and the keeper was obviously panicking like hell, but surprisingly and was rather shocked to see me getting up as if I've just got off a merry-go-round. Truth be told, it had more to do with my characteristic lack-of-emotional-display and slow reaction to being stunned. It was exhilarating experience nonetheless, and I've a few great pix to prove it. But I'd rather not post them here for fear of getting myself and the keeper in trouble since rhino-riding isn't actually allowed. Back to the rhinos though, they're kinda cool like the so-harmless-and-quiet-type that you forget that they can totally kick your ass if they want to (which is extremely rare and unlikely, unless you have a death wish). Yeah, so go click on the logo and find out more about our local rhinos.

Secondly, would be Unite! Blog Action Day. It's an intiative where October 15th is designated to be a day where many bloggers around the globe will blog about a single issue/theme. The theme for this year is literally, the hottest topic of the year - environment where most people is concerned about global warming. The main idea is to spread awareness and if your blog happens to be a hugely popular one, you can also help to raise funds or contribute your blog's earnings of the day to a green charity. I've already signed up for it, and hope the rest of you guys would join us either by blogging or reading blogs about it.

And finally, here's a link to a friend who did a really courageous thing. How many young people to do you know whom you can call a social activist? Here's one, and here's what he did.

2007-09-03T00:00:00.000+08:00

Here are some old pics from the Australasian Debating Championship in UiTM (Australs) way back in July. Wasn't the best of times, wasn't the best of tourneys and wasn't the best of organising. Enough said.

Evening view from outside the hotel window (Subang Villa). Not taken by me (as with most of the pictures here).

Welcoming dinner at UiTM - group pic with the MMU and some NTU guys.

Matthew - Hong Kong dude studying in ANU, Australia. Speaks in thick-accented English.

Reuben Clark - a cool guy from Penang who was my roomie way back during the La Sallian Convention.

Photos taken during the Championship Dinner. With Adam - the only Chinese dude in IIU I've known so far. Have been seeing him around since I first started debating.

Katie from Australia, whom I couldn't recognise (but Salwa did) way back from when UKM organised Pre-Worlds 2005.
Me and my team with Justin (Australian dude from Monash)

Sam - another Australian dude from ANU. Cool guy - has a collectible Batman buckle belt!

UKM's Australs team (L-R): Cher Linn, Jerry, Salwa, me, Sek Kuan

2007-08-19T23:37:00.000+08:00

Short update. Had a relatively good and easy weekend. My brother's back from Singapore this weekend for two reasons: to take a family portrait with me in graduation robes, and my mom's birthday on Sunday.

Last night I went to a friend's birthday party. I was a little apprehensive at first as only me and another friend was invited to that party, and the rest of the people are the inviter's friends (which are unknown to both of us). And then my friend who was going with me brought along her girlfriend. Uh, made me felt a bit awkward and lampost-y. Surprisingly though, the party turned out to be rather fun, and was one of the best parties I've ever gone to (not that I've been to a lot of them). The people at the party were very warm, friendly and funny and I had a great time. And I didn't really feel awkward at all even without the company of both my friends.

Today, I had lunch with another friend. He invited me for lunch the day before, and it turns out that he's not feeling well and that I was supposed to bring lunch to him. And some medication as well. So I went to buy some food and go drug-hunting. Which was actually not that easy. Firstly, I've never bought medication before as I don't go to the doctors often when I'm sick; mostly I just sweat it out the ol'-fashioned way. Secondly, most clinics are closed on Sunday and pharmacies like Guardian and Watson is so commercialised that they don't actually have medication, only toiletries/confectioneries/other stuff. But luckily I managed to find it at Vitacare. Hmm, from now on I think I'll support the more traditional pharmacies that actually offer the service they're supposed to, like Vitacare and Guardian (which only offers pharmaceutical services in its larger shops).

So I brought in kinda a lot of food, as my friend requested. Turns out also that me and him have a different take on the concept of 'more food'. Apparently the amount I brought was kinda excessive. Oh well. We stuffed ourselves silly and then had a nice little chat, before watching a movie on DVD. Actually, the whole thing kinda felt a little weird to me, because I've never had a simple afternoon like this before. Spending time with just a friend in a house. Most of the outings I've been to usually involve more than one person and relatively noisy. Even if it's just one person, usually it'll be out somewhere like a mall or eatery. So this is kinda like a new experience for me.

Yeah, I admit it - I don't have a cool social life. As much as I place a lot of emphasis on friends and friendship, I'm just not a person who's inclined to pick up a phone to ask a friend out. Mostly I let them do the asking. Is it because I fear rejection? Erm, don't think so. I guess maybe I believe that I don't have enough social capital, ie. an influential force to drag people to go out with me. I kinda wonder sometimes whether people like my company enough when they ask me out or was it because more of an obligation. Oh well, I guess this weekend had been pretty good, socially, for me and it was great to hang out with friends I haven't met up in a while.

Convopalooza

2007-08-15T21:32:00.000+08:00

Initally I wanted to post up some pictures from Australs (way back in early July), but procrastination got the better of me. Right now in UKM it's convocation week, beginning last Saturday. And with me being in UKM and really flexible working hours, I went for almost every session to meet up some of my friends. If you haven't guess it by now, this will be a picture post!

Here are those whose convo session I crashed; most of them are debaters.

Star of the picture - Chui Ling, now with a official degree in dentistry.

Another medical doctor and all around-star achiever/excellent debater - Ai Huey.

Ariff - recipient of UKM's first Anugerah Diraja. In short, he's RM2500 richer, adds another cup and cert to his collection and got his face in the papers.

Me and Jespreet - economist extraordinaire.

Geneticists - Ling Ying and Wei San.

Yuan - Physics dude. Well-built, not too shoddy
a Taekwondo exponent, and erm.. a good-looking chap?

Diyana - Nuclear technologist currently working in Shell.
Somehow that phrase sounds a lil' perturbing.

Daniel - The only Sarawakian Chinese dude I know
who majors in BM.

Some teething problems and minor annoyances aside, I think my own convo went fairly well. I was kinda worried at first as my mortarboard (cap) was awfully loose and seems to be in danger of slipping off every 10 seconds. But luckily I managed to get on and off stage without falling prey to any embarrassing sticky situations. Later outside however, with all of us practically sweating like pigs locked in a sauna and me getting tired of adjusting my mortarboard all the time - some of the pics my mortar is just looking kinda silly.

Zoologists unite! Yeah, I know there's only four of us.
L-R: My best mate Kok Wai, Ai Thin, Sun Wei, me.

My erm pusat-mates (same department, different courses).
L-R: Ke Jing (Microbe), Kok Wai, Lih Fong (Plant Biotech), me, Eng Shen (Microbe).

More pusat-mates. I think I'm the only one looking
at the right camera during the shot.

People who crashed my convo! Hehe..

My ex-roommate during my first year! Yay, and he brought a gift too.

Au Yong - collegemate and engineering dude. Really friendly and helpful guy.

Salwa and Fea. Yay, I finally got a flower too. ...yeah...

All in all it was pretty ok. Sure I was hoping more people would come and give me stuff (greedy ol' me), and well, there were some people I was hoping would turn up. Oh well, at least it I didn't need to take many shameless cam-whoring photos and stand idly by to pass the time.

So yeah, the 'big' day is finally over. Didn't feel as if I've gained a new level of maturity, but well at least technically I'm acknowledged that as a degree holder, I have a some semblance of maturity and competence level. And oh yeah, a big thanks to all who came and for the well-wishes; really appreciate them.

2007-08-04T23:32:00.000+08:00

I've already started working bout 3 weeks ago as a research assistant in my uni. It's going well, and it's kinda like studying but getting paid for it. I carry out labwork and look up informations and articles. So far I've managed to kinda pick up the pace and learned more about molecular techniques and protocols, especially on RNA extraction. And I've also gotten my first paycheck for this job a few days ago. Not that much, but will have to suffice for now. And I've also moved back to my college. I got a nice little room for two, just that nobody has apparently moved in yet. Which suits me just fine. So for now I've a kinda large comfy room with an unused bed and wardrobe on one side.

And well, my convo's due soon - 15th August to be exact. Anyone who has nothing better to do than than facing impending rush-hour traffic at 5 pm, struggling to find a empty parking lot amidst the flood of cars, and brave hundreds of ecstatic, sweating-profusely-graduates in multi-coloured robes is hereby welcomed to drop by and erm, congratulate me...? Anyway...yeah, friends old and new, acquaintances and friendly primates are all invited to come for my convocation.

I just took my convo robe this morning. It's all... Well my uni has a colour-coding system where there's a different colour for each faculty's graduation robes. My faculty, well has chosen the colour reminiscent of an (annoying) triassic host of a popular children's tv programme. Ok, I'm rambling. My point is, the whole thing doesn't feel all...big to me. I know it's always pictured in countless shows how when you stand there on stage in your graduation robe and crown, it's like the pinnacle event of your life with your parents/grand-auntie/neighbour's dog wiping away tears of joy etc.

For me though, it seemed just like another step in life. Not a passing chapter/stage in life, but just a step. The thing is, I don't feel as if this is the cumulation of all the blood, sweat and tears for the past 3 years. Sure there had been crazy deadlines on lab reports and thesis work that ate up the wee hours of morning, but I don't really feel that it's an entirely painstaking torturous path that finally led up to this 'grand' day. More like a continual road that one walks as part of one's journey in life.

Also, it just kinda hit me , again, how we've also moved on. I went out with some secondary friends a while ago (where I was suckered into chipping in for a birthday gift which up till now I've no idea what it is, but that's beside the point), and we were talking about work. Yeah, no longer are we talking bout our boring lectures, assignments etc, but work - the things we do, the irritating supervisor, the gossipy colleagues, the pay *shudders* and getting a car etc. It just kinda feels surreal, ya' know? Like when did we move on from being kids to working adults? When was it at that split second where we grew another brain, discarded our carefree childish ways to move on to working and *gulp*, starting a family? Especially when I just heard that a certain someone not that many years older that me might be getting married soon... Yikes! Don't get me wrong, I'm happy for him if it comes true, but it really wreaks havoc with my little personal biological clock.

Well, starting a family is something which erm still gets me the cold feet sensation every time... How do I know if I'm ready? Will I ever be ready? Right now, it's something way over the horizon for me. I kinda like and am comfortable with what I'm doing right now, so I'll stick with it and be blissfully ignorant for now. And yeah, another friend of mine recently applied and got in as a health reporter for the Star. How cool is that?? It proves that idealism and courage among the youths in this country still exists, despite how our elders and Big Brother try to stifle. I too, hope that I'll be one of them - ready to take up a different path, a road less travelled.

2007-06-20T00:50:00.000+08:00

Song: Do You Know (The Ping-Pong Song) - Enrique Iglesias

So I've finally made my decision - I turned down HSBC's offer. Actually that was my 2nd final decision. At first I was thinking of taking up the MDP programme by HSBC by two months (July & August) before quitting and jumping back to RA in my uni. Two months - not too long as too push my original plans too much and avoid myself being sucked too deeply into the corporate world; and not too short for me to get a glimpse of a professional working environment.

HSBC even said yes when I asked if I could take a the first week of July off to debate in Australs. So technically the idea sounds cool. Until I realised that even if I can take one week off, I'll be too busy working to go for any training or preparing for the tournament. And pushing it to another friend who before this declined to go for Australs due to personal commitments made me feel terribly bad.

Which led me to make my 2nd final decision - turn down the HSBC's offer completely. And after coming to that decision, I felt very much at ease. I guess as much as I try to tell myself that consideration of other people don't matter, it does. Yeah, everyone tells me that it's my decision to make, it's my future, don't let other things affectt your decisions etc. Yeah, I know. But if I do take 2 months off, I'll be inconviencing my lecturer (who's already ordered the chemicals and prepared stuff for me), my accomodations which I managed to luckily secure back at my college, my friend, and well, myself.

All for me to just experience what's it like to step into the glitzy corporate world. I guess deep down, I was a bit tired of being made fun of ("So are you gonna work in a zoo now?") and wanted to well, live up a bit to the barometer of respect dictated by society. To put on a crisp shirt with a tie and step into the hectic world phones ringing, currencies being transferred and traded, and handling important-looking documents. To plaster on smile and mingle with the rich and famous, laughing politely while sipping champagne at a fancy cocktail party. But no, I can't do it by inconveniencing so many people just so I can play 'working professional"'for two months.

When I first applied to HSBC for the heck of it, my thought was to see whether I can be accepted into the corporate world, if I choose to do so. Whether I'm able to break free from the confines of my degree and if I possess skills that would enable me to go further. And in that aspect, I think I succeeded. So that should be good enough for me; at least now I know if 10 years down the road if I'm languishing somewhere in a lab with my research funding cut off, I can jump to the corporate world if I choose to. Worse comes to worst, I'll just reapply to the MDP programme again. So when I actually got accepted, it suddenly became real - the temptation of a 'stable, regular job'. And it put me in a dilemma.

I think most people who know me would say that I'm quite blunt and emotionless. That I'm more of a logical and realist. But when it comes to making big decisions in my life, somehow I tend to follow my heart than my head.

2007-06-16T00:50:00.000+08:00

Daily Horoscope for Aries:

"A gulf may continue to grow between your head and your heart. You may be quite sure of yourself and know what you want to do, but sensitivity to someone else's needs prevents you from forging ahead with your plan. There is no need to change your mind about what you want. Live with the dilemma for now until you find a bridge across the chasm."

Saturday, June 16, 2007

Decisions

2007-06-10T23:22:00.000+08:00

Song: Big Girls Don't Cry - Fergie

Last Friday, I went out dinner with some old Form 6 friends. It felt really good to see everyone again, and I had a great time and the food was pretty decent too. Anyway, we got to talking and again I was hit by the realisation that we've reached a new different stage of life. Most of us have already finished our studies, a couple of them are working, and one of them has just paid the downpayment for a new car.

Am I really ready for this? To move on to the next stage of my life whereby I really take charge to forge my future. All along I've usually just made my decisions as it were and just accepted with little regrets. Sure I do contemplate some what-ifs once in a while. Like what if I've applied and gotten a JPA scholarship? What if I've chosen to study a different field like medicine/law/language/journalism? But then I don't let them get to me as I realised the things I have right now that wouldn't have existed otherwise.

And during that dinner too I got a call from the dude at HSBC. Actually, the previous day I went to HSBC building in Kuala Lumpur for a half-day assessment which was quite challenging - we had to read a case study, do presentation, negotiate with another person in a meeting, and conduct a group discussion. All the while being supervised by 3 senior managers! It was quite nerve-wrecking but a good experience nonetheless. Anyway, the HSBC dude told me that well, I've been accepted.

Which kinda puts me in a dilemma now. I wasn't really keen in the first place, and I've kinda decided to follow up with my RA stint and post-grad studies. But now that I've actually gotten accepted, well the offer is really quite good. And it would be interesting to try working in a professional competitive environment. But once I joined in, most likely I'll continue and then I'll end up in a corporate path. (Presumably) leading a comfortable life, get a nice house and then once in a while do my bit for charity...

Which will be a total waste then of what I studied for my degree and the principal reason why I picked it in the first place. How I wanted to actively contribute to the environment, and doing a job that would at least indirectly bring about betterment for the environment and society.

Right now I'm leaning more towards my original plan of RA-ing and then study. The HSCS offer is a tempting one, so yeah...

obligations

2007-06-09T13:02:00.000+08:00

Sometimes I do things which I don't really like - my simple reasoning being that "Because someone has to do it." And it might as well be me. In the past I've taken up stuff which I didn't like, but I did them anyway. Like going alone for events as a representative/obligation. It's kinda boring and awkward, but I try to manage somehow. And being all polite and friendly at socials to people I wouldn't remember the next day. Sometimes it feels really shallow and hypocritical, and sometimes too I'm frightened at how quickly I shift from one person to another when dealing with people.

A friend once said that I'm quite an accommodating person. I don't like making decisions and tend to let other people decide because I'm mostly fine with whatever that will be decided. Generally I just don't like imposing my decisions on others. And even if it's hard decisions that will affect me, I don't like to say how I feel about a certain Decision A vs Decision B. I think when it comes down to it, I just don't like upsetting people, especially those which I'm close to. And if a bit of sacrifice is needed on my part, I'd take it. Because I understand that all of us have many obligations in life and it's a constant give-and-take when it comes to people around you. Not that I'm keeping a favour debit/credit checklist, but it just seems that I tend to give too much credit while getting little debit in return. Though I do subscribe to the idea of karma, mostly I just tell myself that the reward is in the satisfaction of the deed.

Earth Day

2007-06-04T23:14:00.000+08:00

Today, 5th June is World Environment Day. And I gotta say this year's has gotta been the most trumpeted one so far. In the past, it usually got ditched by more important news like Paris Hilton break-up or another Lindsay Lohan's night out gone wrong. Anyway, with all the talk and focus on the dominant issue of global warming, you've gotta be living in a nuclear bunker to not notice the new trend - green is in.

Yeah, it's cool to be green now and many people are starting to change - green living, green marriages, green transport, green fuel, green greens etc. And I guess in a way I'm pleased that people's started to take up the issue more seriously besides the typical response of going "Yeah, no wonder it is getting hotter", then turning up the air-con two notches higher.

On a local level, the awareness isn't so strong yet. We are more worried bout the increasing prices of roti canai and iced milo than the spate of unpredictable weather we've been experiencing. But it is indeed heartening to note that there are few people put there who willing give up some of life's comforts for the greater good of the environment. Like Regine Cheah, who gave up a the usual comforts of desk job and now surviving just barely by working for an NGO called Global Environmental Centre. And also, Ruth Yeoh Pei Cheen who's organising so many events on the enviroment. She's also handling other things, corporate-wise with her high position in one of the YTL companies.

I've kinda pride myself being environmentally-aware, and I try to do my part here and there. Like reduce plastic, recycle a bit, save water/electricity/paper etc. But what I do pales in comparison to those people above. I mean, would I be willing to give up all for the environment? Eke out an existence on the fringe of a rainforest to study the orang utans? I guess when it comes down to it, I'm not really martyr-material who's willing to sacrifice everything for a cause.

And if anything, both of them showed that there are many different ways to help the environment. Like Regine doing her bit by reducing wastage and saving resource: Ruth creating more awareness and using her corporate skills to make changes in the way businesses run. Me, as I mentioned previously, would most likely follow a more academic path and try to shed light on some of nature's mysteries.

A lot of communities and cities like California, New York and Japan has started implementing energy-saving designs and features into the city. We can all start with ourselves without waiting for our local government to implement laws or guidelines, if they ever get around to it. For tomorrow's Environmental Day, let's start by making small changes - try avoiding plastic if possible, save water and energy, drive less etc. Together we can save a lot of energy and reduce wastage, and this itself will be a big step in helping out environment.

And oh, I've just bought Linkin Park's new album, Minutes to Midnight. It's a little uneven compared to the previous album Meteora and Hybrid Theory where the tempo is kept pretty hard and furious most of the time. It's a little ... different and it might take a few listens to fully appreciate it, but I do think it's quite a good album nonetheless.

of life's paths..

2007-05-22T22:46:00.000+08:00

Song: Makes me wonder - Maroon 5, What I've Done - Linkin Park

"So what you gonna do after this? - If I get paid a dollar each time I get asked this, I'd probably be able to afford a hectare of the Amazonian rainforest by now.

2 days ago, I submitted the bound, booked, hard-covered version of my thesis. So technically, I'm done with my undergraduate studies. Now only waiting to officially graduate at the convocation around august, barring any problems.

Ok, well to avoid repeating myself countless times, again, here's my rough plan layout. Take a break. Work as a reseach assistant (RA) at my uni from july till end of the year. Pursue post-grad studies after that in molecular biology, specialising in phylogenetics.

Most annoying right now would be my parents (especially dad) talking about the options. I like to keep my options open too, but he's always skewing towards securing a stable job, earn lots of money. This came about because I tried applying for the HSBC Management Trainee Programme. I was just testing the waters, or perhaps more specifically my job-securing credentials. And now he goes on and on about it. Which really annoys me, as I think of turning it down if I get it (which is highly unlikely, anyway). And this is why I don't like telling stuff like these to my parents.

I've already mentioned that job satisfaction is more important to me, but I guess that's parents for you. Their mindset is different, where life's roadplan is already fixed - study, get job, earn lots of money, get married and make babies. Which to me all of these are just possibilities. *Gasp*. Yes indeed, I guess I'm more liberal that way. The idea of marriage freaks me out right now, and I seriously don't think I'm anywhere ready for it. I've heard about people meeting their spouses in college, people getting married as early as 20 or directly after graduating. Yikes! But erm, to each his or her own, I guess.

All this time too, I've been pondering my direction in life. I wanna do something that means something to me at the end of the day. Something that I can see myself doing for a long time. Which is why I don't feel like getting a regular job. Or working in a bank. No offence to people who work in bank, but I wanna do something that contributes to the environment, or at the very least society. To me, working in bank/factory/company etc only feeds a self-serving niche - a service that is created by the functional workings of society itself.

My original dream was to do something with environmental conservation, maybe something like working with the animals or something. Since my course of study has been diverted, and with rethinking and reconsidering my limitations and abilities; there has been slight readjustments to my plans. I plan to pursue post-grad in phylogenetics, and using that to discover and understand more on the phylogeny and evolutionary relationships particularly among animals. Perhaps even discover a new subspecies or a new perspective of certain genes. So my approach to environmental conservation would be more academic rather than field.

Well, yeah. Work that pursuits knowledge for the sake of knowledge doesn't guarantee a comfy lifestyle. When was the last time you heard of millionaire environmentalist? TV personalites notwithstanding. For me, the usual traditional/play-if-safe path isn't enough for me. It's hard, and the temptation is high to just plunk into a stable, dreary, 9-5 job. But I'll try to persevere and from time to time, remind myself that there is more to life.

Picture post

2007-05-13T00:06:00.000+08:00

A couple of weeks ago, there was this visit to Alliance Francaise which was organised by one of the French lecturers. So I hopped along there, with nothing else better to do during a between-paper break. The place was somewhere in KL, and initial impressions fell short as it turned out to be a large renovated bungalow rather than a sprawling complex/building which I imagined it to be. And all pictures posted here is NOT taken by yours truly, so don't hurl any bricks at me.

Main entrance of Alliance Francaise.

First order of the day - lunch! Here's the drinks menu.

The food menu.

Bunch of us at the table, killing time while waiting for the food.

French dude, and master chef extraordinaire. He has lived in Malaysia for a couple of years, and knows sufficient malay and english. Forgot his name though.

First arrival - spinach quiche. Made from a mixture of cream, egg, milk and slices of vegetable. Extremely scrumptious.

Some sorta salad. Moving on.

The deserts. Left - tart de pomme (apple pie); right - lemon meringue. The apple pie has slices of preserved apple, a little too sour for my liking. But still tasted alright. The lemon meringue was extremely good, sweet without an overbearing of lemon flavour and with a creamy top.

No, this is not from Alliance Francaise. Just me and some coursemates out and about in Sunway Pyramid. Tried ice skating for the first time, sucked badly and ended up with a scraped ankle.

thoughts

2007-04-28T01:34:00.000+08:00

It's not easy to balance between emotions and cynicism. Most people tend to develop varying degrees of cynicism at they progress in life, getting more disillusioned and hardened by what they face.

Most people who know me would say that I'm a cynic, a realist, a jaded soul. I admit, I've never been a very emotional person to begin with, I don't "feel" things as much as people generally would. The walls around me were very much fortified with the events of form six. I swear to myself then that I would not give a s**t what people think, and do things as I like. You can't please everyone, so well live and let live.

I've learned to shed a few of those barriers later, in thanks to some good company I have. Closer friends would often get to see the sillier, uninhibited side of me. And I've learned to "feel" more, so to speak. And then things happen and you question whether it's worth it to let your guard down again. Because to allow yourself to "feel" more also lets you feel all the nasty things even harder when it hits.

Despite swearing myself to ignore others' thoughts, once again I let the little things get to me. Not so long ago, a friends asked me for a favour. We both know the principle of it wasn't right, I know it wasn't right. In the end, it didn't turn out so well and I regretted giving in to the plea. I should've stuck to my principles and said no, but I gave in. And now said friend is giving me the cold shoulder, and trying to erase all traces of my existence. Pretending that I don't exist. Perhaps in doing so, hoping to bury the past.

It shouldn't matter to me, but it does. The aftermath was equal for us to share; I guess said friend thought the way to deal with it would be to cut me off completely. I guess in the end I was disappointed that there wasn't enough of our relatively short friendship for said friend to consider before choosing that option. Maybe it's karma coming back from the time I turned away a friend when I can't stand his annoying ways anymore. At times I like this I wonder whether I should've keep those walls intact around me.

*Edit: Rereading through my post, I guess I might have come off a little too strongly and prejudicing against said friend. I'm not really angry at said friend, guess I was just disappointed. Last paragraph has been edited.

*Re-edit: Ok, screw looking beyond the bad side of people. Any benefit of the doubt for said friend's actions has just evaporated. Said friend is now avoiding me like a plague, and even went out of the way to do so. Sigh - another painful reminder that you shouldn't think the best of people. If someone acts screwed up, more than likely he's a screwed up.

Alors, bienvenue...

2007-04-11T23:02:00.000+08:00

Well then, welcome to my new blog. First thing you might notice is the slight name change. A matter of appearance and technicality only, I assure you. Merely due to the former name of my old blog has been taken. One of these days I'd be inclined to who's actually taken up 'nyxator' in blogspot. Ahem, anyway so this blog will be named as such appeared above.

Secondly, this blog is still under construction, which is why it looks rather dull at the moment. Though I can't say it'll look all snazzy and cool after this with my lack of graphical creativity. Allow me some time while I learn and tinker with what Blogspot can offer. I've to say so far I'm quite pleased with Blogspot. As expected, it's more stable than Blog-city.

Moving on, let's talk about well, me. Hehe, so yesterday was Tuesday, April 10 - the big day for various reasons. As usual, the best-laid plans often go awry. Recounting them down:

1. Got up around 7.20 in the morning and got ready for my French class at 8.00. Only had bout 4 hours of sleep as I was proof-reading my thesis for the umpteenth time making sure not even a single typo is in place. Anyway I showered, grabbed a cookie and was about to leave when I saw a msg on my phone. It's from my lecturer, saying class was cancelled. Aikz!! And I was so psyched about it already. Which means I'll be having a replacement class sometime later. And I was already all cleaned up and fresh after my shower, it's not like I can jump into bed and doze off. Sigh, so anyway, after much attempt, I did semi-sleep bout 1 hour.

2. Arrived bout 10 minutes late for my Biotek Haiwan kelas. I figured since we're doing presentations today, it wouldn't matter much. With luck, all I miss is the first presentation and then I can slipped in either as the 2nd or 3rd presenter. Went into class, and huh? She was lecturing halfway. Cursing and scratching my head, I just started copying. Apparently presentation was scrapped, and instead we need to hand in the powerpoint presentation by 5 pm that day. Sigh.. Another problem. No offense, but handing in my Pwp notes is won't make much sense to anyone as I adopt a minimalist style for Pwp presentation. I don't clutter my slides with tons of notes and detailed explanations - after all it is a presentation and not a reading aloud session. So I have to go back, edit the slides, adding in more details. Realised it still won't make sense, so I edited my also-concise-presentation notes and attached it with the powerpoint slides.

3. A friend informed me that we need to hand in 3 copies of thesis. Which was not mentioned at ALL by the notice of submittion stuck in the office. So quickly I tried printing 2 more copies - and run out of paper. So I have to dash to the shop (bout 7 minutes away) to get another stack of paper - Double A, mind you. Cos they're of better quality, and most importantly, they support the environement. And then the time it took for checking and binding, etc. Which was the reason of my lateness for no 2.

4. For the benefit of those who don't understand French, or bother translating the sentence - basically it was my birthday. Like I said, it was kinda building up to a big day - like submitting my thesis after all the hours poured into it, and then ending my classes for this semester with 2 presentations back-to-back.

Since I'm a realist, as one of my friends distinctly point out, no point dwelling on what happened. On the bright side though, quite a surprising number of people send me birthday wishes. Good friends, recent ones, old (sorry) acquaintances and some coursemates. Unfortunately though some of my coursemates were still busy, so there was no going out with them. And since I was planning on having something nice for dinner and I knew this good coursemate of mine, well..he's quite attached to his wallet so I didn't want to make him feel bad. In the end, I just had some fast-food takeaway, and spent a quiet night. It was a really weird feeling, for me to just go surfing online and doing other trivial stuff without the whole thesis clout hovering above me. Guess I had gotten too used to worrying and working on it.

Apparently my body feels the same way too. Even though I've only had like 4-5 hours of sleep for the past few days, I wasn't immediately tired or drifted off the moment I hit the bed. Even now, I'm actually having trouble grabbing a nap in in afternoon or sleeping around 12 at night; in attempts to recover the missing sleep hours. I''ve already started some pseudo-detox regiment though, chiefly with cutting down on my coffee intake ie reducing the number of cups I have and switching back to Nescafe reguler. And also drinking more water.

My first paper for finals is next Thursday, so yeah I'm a bit unmotivated to pick up my books and start studying for it. Before this, with the thesis thing going on, all my classes were a blur. I just go in, listened, and copied down the notes. I guess now I should really focus on figuring them out properly.

That's it for my first entry in this spanking new blog. Erh, yeah I know this isn't exactly the most awe-inspiring or brilliant piece of writing.