Sometimes I get too wrapped up around myself that I tend to forgot the simple things in life like spending time with good company. On some unknown-post-birthday-slightly-daring streak , I've been asking quite a number (actually a few, but for me it's a new record) for outings like lunch etc. Really hope it's not the old-age-crisis/loneliness fear that's driving me.
A couple of days ago, went out for dinner with Fea and realised that's been quite a while since we the last time we really just sit relaxedly and having a great time. The next day I went out for lunch with PY, whom again I haven't seen in ages and had since undergone an almost remarkable physical transformation. And I too realised how few are the people whom I'm really comfortable and sharing a similar wavelength. Just being in the company of a that person and letting yourself loose can be extremely therapeutic.
Today I went for breakfast and lunch with two different groups of friends. The breakfast one was with a few old secondary school friends. It started of like this - In my (rare) semi-desperate moment of getting a lunch date last weekend, I tried contacting some old friends from Form 5, also collectively known a "the gang". It didn't work out but I guess Eric wanted to make up for it, so he asked me for breakfast this morning at Raju's, an undeservingly hyped-up and overpriced mamak directly next to our alma mater. Supposedly there would be Ben and Chong too.
The crowd turned out to be a bit bigger - Weng Yew came along, with Kok Wei and one of their ex-Scouter sir joining in. It was getting kinda awkward; firstly since I've never been close to at least 2 people on that table, and secondly their former Scouter was a complete stranger to me.
Surprisingly, it turned out much better than expected. Meeting up with old friends (and in turn their companions) is something I dread, especially ones you haven't kept in touch or seen for so long that you've drifted too far out of each other's life to be able to relate and connect with substantially. Which would translate into awkward briefs of silence and resorting to fillers like the weather ("Been raining quite a lot these days huh?" "Yeah, that's true." "Yeah...") and jobs ("So what do you do now?" "The same - ..." "Oh" "Yeah.").
Of course there were those awkward pauses when everyone momentarily runs out of conversational topics, and I was a little self-conscious too, feeling as I'm an outsider attempting to push into another's clique. But they didn't last long. And apparently time seems to be kinder on others' impression/memory of you. Everyone at the table was treating me fairly well, even those whom I've barely exchanged more than 20 words during school last time other than the usual pleasantries. Almost everyone also shook hands as they arrived and left, which left me scratching my head a bit. Guess I'm quite a stranger at this meeting up with old friends thingie
I must be sounding a lil' like a broken record by now, but it never ceases to amaze me to see a friend after a long period of time. They looked a little older, relaxed and mature; but still with bits that allude to their former selves as you remembered them. And it's also interesting to see how a certain someone turned out - contrasting their present pursuits with their past selves. From those days of being a carefree student to a *gulp* working adult. Like who'd picture a reckless outdoorsy guy doing a PhD in science ? And the topics of conversation, well naturally it went from current occupations to listing other old friend and what they're up to now. And of course on a guys-only table, it also went to social status (ie. girlfriends) and physical (ie. losing weight and building muscles). I kid you not, I strongly believe it's due to Hollywood's brainwashing where beautiful guys and girls are a dime a dozen and looking average is an exception. Not to mention the recently published and much-awaited Cleo issue with The 50 Most Eligible Bachelors. It's not easy being a guy these days - we have to dedicate as much attention to our physical aspect as much as our career and play. What happened to the good ol' days of merely bringing home the roti?
Sigh... Anyway, I realised that after taking a small step of initiating contact with former acquaintances, that it isn't that scary. And the results can be really rewarding. Guess my extremely-late-new-year-resolution would be to take up more initiative on asking out friends, both old and current.
A couple of days ago, went out for dinner with Fea and realised that's been quite a while since we the last time we really just sit relaxedly and having a great time. The next day I went out for lunch with PY, whom again I haven't seen in ages and had since undergone an almost remarkable physical transformation. And I too realised how few are the people whom I'm really comfortable and sharing a similar wavelength. Just being in the company of a that person and letting yourself loose can be extremely therapeutic.
Today I went for breakfast and lunch with two different groups of friends. The breakfast one was with a few old secondary school friends. It started of like this - In my (rare) semi-desperate moment of getting a lunch date last weekend, I tried contacting some old friends from Form 5, also collectively known a "the gang". It didn't work out but I guess Eric wanted to make up for it, so he asked me for breakfast this morning at Raju's, an undeservingly hyped-up and overpriced mamak directly next to our alma mater. Supposedly there would be Ben and Chong too.
The crowd turned out to be a bit bigger - Weng Yew came along, with Kok Wei and one of their ex-Scouter sir joining in. It was getting kinda awkward; firstly since I've never been close to at least 2 people on that table, and secondly their former Scouter was a complete stranger to me.
Surprisingly, it turned out much better than expected. Meeting up with old friends (and in turn their companions) is something I dread, especially ones you haven't kept in touch or seen for so long that you've drifted too far out of each other's life to be able to relate and connect with substantially. Which would translate into awkward briefs of silence and resorting to fillers like the weather ("Been raining quite a lot these days huh?" "Yeah, that's true." "Yeah...") and jobs ("So what do you do now?" "The same - ..." "Oh" "Yeah.").
Of course there were those awkward pauses when everyone momentarily runs out of conversational topics, and I was a little self-conscious too, feeling as I'm an outsider attempting to push into another's clique. But they didn't last long. And apparently time seems to be kinder on others' impression/memory of you. Everyone at the table was treating me fairly well, even those whom I've barely exchanged more than 20 words during school last time other than the usual pleasantries. Almost everyone also shook hands as they arrived and left, which left me scratching my head a bit. Guess I'm quite a stranger at this meeting up with old friends thingie
I must be sounding a lil' like a broken record by now, but it never ceases to amaze me to see a friend after a long period of time. They looked a little older, relaxed and mature; but still with bits that allude to their former selves as you remembered them. And it's also interesting to see how a certain someone turned out - contrasting their present pursuits with their past selves. From those days of being a carefree student to a *gulp* working adult. Like who'd picture a reckless outdoorsy guy doing a PhD in science ? And the topics of conversation, well naturally it went from current occupations to listing other old friend and what they're up to now. And of course on a guys-only table, it also went to social status (ie. girlfriends) and physical (ie. losing weight and building muscles). I kid you not, I strongly believe it's due to Hollywood's brainwashing where beautiful guys and girls are a dime a dozen and looking average is an exception. Not to mention the recently published and much-awaited Cleo issue with The 50 Most Eligible Bachelors. It's not easy being a guy these days - we have to dedicate as much attention to our physical aspect as much as our career and play. What happened to the good ol' days of merely bringing home the roti?
Sigh... Anyway, I realised that after taking a small step of initiating contact with former acquaintances, that it isn't that scary. And the results can be really rewarding. Guess my extremely-late-new-year-resolution would be to take up more initiative on asking out friends, both old and current.
who is this PY?
ReplyDeleteChum Pak Yang ah?